Day 4....

Today is day 4 of my week without SI'ing. This is the fourth day since my stitches, the fourth day since the fight with my mum, the fourth day since a lot of things really.The urge to cut was so strong this morning, I actually dreamt about it. I took my son to school and concentrated on the washing and cleaning up. I hate cleaning but anything to keep my mind occupied.I can't sit still. I'm still slightly up. I tried to watch tv and i went straight for my hair to pull it. Another no no. I will not subject myself to self harm. Four days is a long time.New meds are strange too. They're making me really drained and wiped out, like I just want to sleep  but my mind's saying no. My mind doesn't want to sleep. It's just racing thought after thought. I tried writing some more of my book, no doubt it's total crap.