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i got a temporary job and started today! which is a good thing, but also, just... not. i'm working at a nursery so i'm in the sun all day harvesting pumpkins which as i learned today, is exhausting. and it is just a huge reminder of how much time i am wasting. i mean, i am getting paid and it will be nice to have some money since i currently have absolutely none, but i want to do something that i enjoy. just as a job to get me through school and let me move out of my parents house. like working in a clothing store or a restaurant or something. i'm just so unhappy and i feel like instead of being miserable for 9 hours a day i could be looking for a better job, getting my licence, working towards being more independent! but i'm in this thing 'til the work is done. and it fucking sucks.