Crazy?

I guess you think I'm crazy talking to you every day, but it gives me a present tense connection like the minister said it would.  I am still your wife - you are still my husband.  I love you with all my heart and know I will never be able to love another like I do you.  And do I want to?  No.
I've discovered a lot of things with myself through private counseling.  One is that the independence I've always had is becoming strong again.  The other is that I am sure God has a purpose for my life now, perhaps to help others, instead of being someone's companion, girlfriend or wife.  I miss companship, but I miss YOUR companionship.  Nothing else is going to suit the bill.  I also don't want anyone touching the places of my body that you did.  May sound selfish, but that is me and coming from my heart.
Do I feel alone or lonely?  No, not really.  I have the cat, and my family.  I also have friends that I socialize with.  My life is content the way it is and I hope it gets better and stays that way.
I love you, I miss you, and I am OK. 

Replies

BeccaZ
BeccaZ

Not crazy, I write a letter to Jim everyday just to say hi and talk about my day. I have filled 3 journals in the past 8 months and I figure there will be many more. I will be his wife forever and like you, I am really good with that.
Have a blessed day
Becca Z
radioworld
radioworld

when we love the way we do, there is no other way to express our love, other than to keep that \"connection\" that lives in our heart alive, because it lives in our hearts, in our soul, and no one can ever change or take that away from you. There are times when I find myself missing companionship, considering the possibilities, but then seconds later I recognize that all I really want is my Richard. I am missing him and always will, no one can ever take that from me, it is impossible. Life will happen to me, and it will happen to you too. We can only hope that what ever life has in store for us, that we can find happiness.
jerseydebbie
jerseydebbie

Radioworld, I am like you. I have considered the possibilities also, but realize that all I want is my Richard. Just the thought of being someone else\'s partner makes me gravely upset. And, to tell the truth, I don\'t want any other man touching me. Maybe I\'m being selfish with my life, but I also have to be true to my heart.