I saw my counselor today at an time that doesn't work well with my med schedule. I made it through but he asked how i was mentally abused and i couldn't think of how to put it.
i asked him to write a letter to the church to dissolve my sealing to my first marriage because of feeling i have about the church holding women to men that get remarried without canceling their sealing.
I'd be surprised if he ever would want to go back and be sealed to his new wife, but i would never want to be called a "first wife" if the church doesn't believe in polygamy then how can they keep you separated later.
so i am going to talk with my bishop if i can get an appointment sunday and bring up this topic and start the paperwork.what i thought about is that in our church a sealing is bound in heaven. 
so is it right that every time he has sex he is committing adultery? if i am still sealed to him i would say yes then me being married twice since him would also be yes.