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Well hello, here I am again to have a little chat about me. Then again this whole thing is about me so I don't think you'll mind, will you? Anyway I haven't been sleeping too much recently but it doesn't get me down, quite the opposite, I feel really happy and energised right now and there just don't seem to be enough hours in the day to do stuff even though all I'm doing is thinking. I feel good. Anyway the title brings me onto the main point of this entry. I bin cooking. A hobby for me rather than a means to survive. I just use it as a means of occupying my time, and even though the peanut-butter cookies are really good, it is the journey not the result that is important. Always the journey never the result. Everything is just learning off the curve of motion. Ah, my two cents for you, and a bit of personal philosophy thrown in too. It must be your lucky day. It doesn't matter too much for me though when I never really sleep for much of the day. That brings me to the point that I'm in Perth right now according to when I went to sleep, so my body clock is having a little holiday down under. And now a conversation that happened between me and a friend:    "Holy crap, are those arms?"    "Why yes! Yes they are!"Has anyone made a randometer yet, because I want to see how far up it that ranks.In other news my music taste goes from eclectic to... well... more eclectic I guess. I'm listening to four songs right now: Warrior's dance - Prodigy, Don't Let Man Get You Down - Fatboy Slim, Dirty Little Secret - All American Rejects and I Write Sins Not Tragedies - Panic At The Disco. I challenge you to find a conection between those songs. I like them because they are all sort of 'feel-good' songs. Well that's a conection, I was kind of looking for a genre connection though. Anyway I'm only just getting started here so if you are looking for a short entry for a bit of light reading you should probably look away sharpish.I've been watching a lot of films recently, actually it is series 1 of House but the principal of watching it with a DVD player remains the same. Anyway I like it because it represents a person who works against the flow and gets the job done. His thought processes and how he works through the puzzle, a whole rubix thing. Thinking that one thing might be right but if it is wrong then looking for another reason and another way of sorting things out. His persistence too. If you aren't getting what I'm alluding to I'm crypticly saying that a lot of people are stupid, they always think that what they first thought was right even if it wasn't it couldn't have been they also have no patience. Still not getting it? People are jerks, almost everyone who I used to trust turned out to be jerks. They're all jerks. Any way the character of House is great, the way that Hugh Laurie plays him is great. It's hard to think that the same guy who is in several Blackadder episodes is the dark shrouded doctor. Ah I have so many thoughts right now and I'll do my best to say them all, even if it takes me all night. You know what sucks, my headphones don't work so now I'm stuck with everything going on in my right ear and nothing in my left, I mean, sometimes I have to check to make sure that I'm not going deaf in one ear, it's just so annoying, it feels imbalanced. Not too nice, then every so often I get it to work and it all feels fine until it breaks againI checked in the diary for when my psychiatrist appointment is, i think that it's on the 18th August, I mean, how annoying is that? I'm a whole month, 9 days and a few hours from then. Couldn't whoever sorts all these dates out have gotten it a little sooner? I mean, are there really that many people that all the appointments up to then are taken? Hmph, I feel a little bit grumpy about the whole fiasco. Still it isn't too long till then though, it should be ok.My big concern is the Bisly competition next week. I wonder if I'll get my own tent. I hope so, it would be fun to get a bit of personal space this time, especialy seeing as who I shared with last time. Anyway I really want to do well this time round, we should be able to do better that 14th or whatever we got last time, we have at least about six people who have the capability to get over around or just below 33-35 and then another 2 who can get around or above 30. We should be able to do well, we aren't that bad are we? At least when we get our act together. The after that is the Imperial competition. I'm not too good with the whole self-coaching thing so I don't think that I will do well at all but the experience should be good and its good to get some practice at it. Still good stuff and all. Should be fun. I can't wait, actually I can but whatever.I guess now I should give a few words about something that I have been mulling over for a while now. What I want to do next. Sure if I get good grades at GCSE I'll go back to Oundle and continue studing for the A-levels, if I get great grades I might even go to Uni. It's weird to think so much depends on so little, but I suppose that is what life is all about, the whole underlying irrationality that underpins the whole sordid construction. Still, if I can pull through it, I'll be alright. If I can pull through it. That is the crux of the matter. I suppose it's all just a wait and see matter. Give it time.l guess that another thing that I've been thinking about is the arrogance of people. So many people say such abstract points that are made by reference to something else thought they do not mention it. People say something like 'I am good', well if your saying that you are good compared to lucifer then you might just be right but if you compare yourself to the person next to you then you might just not be. Saying 'I am philosophical', well what are you comparing yourself to? I mean, lots of people have a few deep thoughts so compared to that then you're about average. However if you are comparing yourself to the nearest rock then you migt just be right, then again for you to actually bring attention to that subject then I can also presume that you are about as tactful and intelligent as that rock as well. Anyway that is just something to mull over. How tactful you are and compared to what. If you disagree then, I don't care, these are of course, my personal thoughts and if I expected or wanted people to pay attention to them I wouldn't have put them on this private blog and woul've put them on something more public. If someone does pay attention to this or doesn't know what to do after reading this, or doesn't realise what is being said or even reacts to this blog in the outside world at all then screw them, they're a jerk. I wonder what tomorrow will bring and I wonder how much I've actually written on this blog because I know I've been writing for a while. I still have stuff to talk about too. According to word this is 5 page and 2,500 words so it's quite a lot and I've been writing for a while. I don't know if I should turn in now or keep writing at 1 o'clock. I guess I'll keep writing.As I said earlier on, I've been cooking today, not exactly surprising seeing as I like to cook and I am better at it than quite a few people. I mean, I can do better than whole 'boil in the bag', and I can do better at warming pasta sauce than just evaporating water out of it. I'm not anything great but it is just a way of occupying my thyme when I don't have anything else to do. (see, I just made a pun, but I don't usually cook with thyme and it wasn't that funny either). Joking aside the holidays get pretty boring, it beats being near all the jerks at school but it is still boring and it is nice to have something to do that isn't walking the dog, watching youtube videos or going on facebook so it's alright I suppose.August this year is a month of many worries, GCSE results come back, and I'm worried about that, and I have the Psychiatrist appointment which I am also worried about so in 2 months time a lot of stress will have lifted, thing is, I don't feel like it will be any different afterwards so I'm worried about stuff, a lot of stuff, right now.I'm thinking about going somewhere now, both in the way of 'maybe I should go somewhere' and 'we're going now'. I dunno Paris, Amsterdam, Berlin. Places on a map to be explored, a bit like the X's on pirates maps (which never actually existed, they never hid the treasure, they spent it all back at whatever port they next went to). Still it seems like a good idea in the same way that the 3 a.m. walk was a good idea but whatever.I want to go somewhere, or do something. I just want to do it, for the sake of it, for whatever reason springs to mind when I step outside the door. Go anywhere and just do whatever feels best. Could be fun, feels like fun at least.So after this short talk I guess you've had a little insight into the goings on in my head, any more and your head would explode.If you've read through to here, you persevered through a lot. If you've skimmed through to here why are you even reading this?Goodbye for now, I'll write later, while still in high spirits.(And if you're from Oundle, you are a jerk, you know what I'm talking about)