conversation continues.....

Had a talk with my husband last night on the way home from our soccer game about middle son.  There are so many issues - Is son self medicating, addicted, or "just" having fun?  I don't think he's ready to go back to school BUT - what the heck is he going to do? He needs structure - perhaps school will jump start him and get him movitated?  Then there is the health insurance problem: If he doesn't go back to school - needs a full time job to pay for it.  He says he wants to go to school - yet his behavior tells me he's not ready.  Husband thinks he needs to go and we will take our financial chances and encourage him.  I agree he needs something - not sure if it's school just yet.  Lots to think about.  I am going to have another conversation with J today.  I am going to try my darnest to not lecture.  When husband and I talked to him the other evening - that's what it sounded like - a lecture.  My husband took the opportunity to air everything that bothered him about J.  I saw J shutdown.  Once we get his insurance underway - I think it might be a good idea to get him into counseling.  The counselor that comes to our home knows about our situation (we shared it with him when T wasn't around) and he really didn't have much to say about it.