conflict
Hey girls,How do you deal with the worries in your mind that you are taking things into your hands and not letting God do what he wants? Everytime I get excited about doing a cycle I worry that I have to come up with the money, and that if its that hard then I am not leaving it in God's hands. I worry that I am putting too much faith in doctors and not God to get me pregnant. Then I think well if I don't do nothing for 3 or 4 years will I just "get pregnant?" I am so conflicted sometimes. WOuld do you think?
Replies
I go through the same dilemna each time. When we were in the process of IVF I kept wondering about what would happen with the embroys that were not used...we all know how that turned out...there were no embroys to speak of. I sometimes feel that God wants me to quit IF and adopt instead. Then other times I really do not think that God plans include a children for us. Letting IF go is difficult. We have finally decided to adopt and let my body heal from all the procedures. If it is going to happen it will, but I can not force it anymore. I sort of feel beaten down...but it is also liberating not to wondered about my cycles anymore.
I hope this bible scripture helps...
Matthew 6: 25-27
\"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your HEAVENLY FATHER feeds them. Are YOU not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
To me, I only hear that we must trust GOD; everything lies in His hands. Nothing is impossible for Him. Place your trust on God first, then on man; remember you cannot have two masters; for you will love one and hate the other.
Please, pray to God.
I think that ultimately if it is his will then you will have your baby IVF or not. Friends of ours were told they could only have children through IVF. So, they wanted 2 children and went thorugh IVF 2 times and got their two children. Now about 2 or 3 years later his wife is now pregnant with their thrid without IVF or anything. So my feeling is if it is your time assisted or not it is your time. I went to an RE who was supposed to one of the best nationally. I ended up with a big fat nothing after three medicated rounds. DH and I decided to go back to the natural IUI, which is how we got pregnatn before to try and be successful. I honestly don\'t believe it has anything to do with whether you take meds or not because otherwise we would all get pregnant much faster since I was told three times in a row I had a perfect cycle. If you feel that IVF is the way to go then do it. God has the ultimate say in the end no matter which way we try to arrive at our miracles and dreams. I hope and pray that you get your miracle. XO :)
I am still confused, I get let go and let God. Yes, I can finds months where I wouldn\'t focus on it. THen, BAM!! it comes back. The urge and desire to get this ball rolling. I don\'t know I feel so confused.