Commitment
I hate writing big checks. Back when such a thing was possible, I got buyer's remorse from buying 3 for a penny candy. The anxiety of spending hasn't gotten any better now that those same candies are a dime a pop. Writing a check big enough to begin work on an aeroponics lab has tied literal knots in my colon. Ouchie grammy. . . I hate colon pain. This morning's personal inventory is pointing toward stress reduction therapy for today. I commited to what?!?!?!?!? Commitments are terrifying. . .
Still. . . I'm enjoying the scanty blueprint hanging on the wall next to where I have been doing my morning rituals. Especially the rooftop garden. Of course the garden, itself, isn't really on the blueprint. All the better to visualize with.
Weather, etc. permitting, demolition of the old building will begin next week. Small steps, big faith and lots of prayer.
Replies
Sounds exciting to me even if nerve racking. Try to enjoy it.
(I hope ive understood what ur building right)
If not feel free to ignore.
When I signed the mortgage on this house, I thought, "Oh. My. God. I am so freaking STUCK until...."
But y'know, we shape spaces. I don't regret that my 401K renovated this place, tho' the reason for much of the renovation is not living here anymore. (Mom.) I am ... trying to be like the rock and the water. I will stay, but I will flow. (OK, seriously, I did not reread the book of Tao recently, so that's not from there...) Trying to say: much puma support, and consider the $ an investment in therapy, perhaps?
@lilbeany, sometimes I don't understand arfie too....just saying.
@arfie, I only understand (a bit) because I knew someone who had something similar.
However, you are aware that I kill all green things...aren't you? Except for grass growing over the sidewalk. For some reason, I just can't kill that. Solution to urbanization...pave it all and watch the grass and trees take over!!
I often don't understand me, either. Works in progress. . . Sorting. . . Itsy bitsy baby steps.