Coming Full Circle and a WTF Moment

Its been months, MONTHS since YG and I messaged and the two rare times we spoke in person since early January (when he acted normal) he was acting weird and distant and like he wanted to avoid me. Ive said I have no idea what happened or why but went with it and acted accordingly. It hurt my feelings because I am so senstivie but I did the best I could under the circumstances.

I haven't actually laid eyes on him in at least three weeks. We had our last sporting event for the season this week.  I pretty much figured he was going to be a no show and I actually wondered if he would be returning next fall. 

I walked into the building, chatted with friends, talked to a friend who has nothing to do with our sport and was not paying much attention to what was going on around me. This was the last night so it was more a meeting and such for next fall, giving out awards, etc.

I come in late to the meeting, see YG and wave quickly because I figure he is avoiding me so trying to act like I would with anyone else.  I don't see him wave because I looked away quickly because I was so nervous and was afraid he would ignore me.

When looking around I can feel him looking at me although luckily there are people and objects obstructing the view (and I tried to keep it that way so I wouldnt feel temped to look over). After the meeting, I go over to my teammates who were standing across from him but my back was to him. I hug them as always and another few people and chat. I turn around and notice he is in another section with his team and I have to walk by them. I do so and do not look. I was not going to be ignored and feel bad again.

All of a sudden I hear my name. HUH???

He comes over to me and says my name out loud. I look at him and he has this big smile on his face. We give each other a big hug (another huh???) and I ask him how his trip was because I dont know what else to say and I am nervous. He starts talking and smiling and acting like he did before I left in January.  I am happy it is "back to normal" but totally floored and have no idea what the hell is going on.

We were not flirting, just normal talking although as before I feel this underlying feeling, like it had been months ago but I wasn't as nervous. We talked a good 15 minutes, easy flow and it felt really good. He did ask a few questions like he used to that made me think he is trying to find some stuff out (just personal info he doesnt know). We would have kept talking but then my H called because he was waiting for me in the bar.   So, I told him to have a good summer and Id see him in the fall. He said "you'll see me this summer.' I gave him a "yeah right" look and asked where the hell I would ever see him and he said there at the sports place. He never comes in other than to do the sport.  I will not be seeing him this summer.  Before the weirdness, I felt like we would eventually just have a nice friendship, a caring one so to speak. In some ways I do feel protective of him. I know his mother left the family when he was a young or mid teen and he recently has become friends with her on FB. I know there are issues there although he has not spoken of it. A friend told me and he has no knowledge that I know this. Ive wondered if this could have something to do with the attraction with me?  I noticed him checking me out months before I decided to approach him to start a simple conversation. He is very shy and can be a bit awkward in conversation.

So again, we hug and I say I am going to practice this summer and he says "yeah then we can have a competition again" with a big smile on his face. This was what our whole flirtation was based on along with jokes about another person on our sport. I felt like the last few months were a bad dream. 

Another complete shock comes when he walks into the bar afterward. He knows I go in after every game. The last few months, since I came back in early March, he was running as fast as he could out of there at the end of the game, not talking to me like he had back in January. We would talk after the sporting event ended and we'd walk to the bar together talking away, joking around, etc.  I was with my team in the bar and in another section and did not walk over or try to talk to him like I normally did back in January. I am not going there again. I am not going to look for his attention or manipulate the situation to talk to him.  I am happy he made the effort to approach me and talk earlier. 

I am at a complete loss as to what happened and why he now is talking to me like nothing changed. Three weeks ago when I talked to him quickly he seemed to have an attitude, almost a bit angry. Not mean, but there was definitely an attitude.

He is not a game player, he usually is a sweet kid. I do not think he was playing hard to get or anything of the sort.  I figured he felt I was married and he didnt want to get too close. I do not know this for sure and am only guessing because it came out of the blue with no rhyme nor reason, no explanation. 

Sure, I am thrilled we can be friends, can chat and I do not have to feel bad, like Ive done something wrong or worse yet like I dont matter. I do not have to worry about how I am supposed to act and whether or not I can approach him and say hello without feeling like I am bothering him or he doesn't want to talk to me.

  I will not see him till September, maybe Aug for a pre sport meeting. We are friends on FB but he rarely posts and rarely "likes" people's posts although I do know he checks it a lot.  I will not be messaging him nor posting to his wall. Even though I know my addict voice and impulsiveness will do its best to steer me in that direction lookingfor that little hit of attention. I have to sit back and wait till fall. I am hoping that things have come full circle and maybe he realizes we can be friends without overthinking things and worrying that I am married.  I am at a place where I am really good with us being just that. The attraction may be there or it may dwindle but I never had any intention of acting on it anyway and even though I was enjoying the attention, because of how it unfolded, I should be able to put it away because I do not want him to feel like he has to run away from me.

The thoughts and fantasies wont go away overnight and I admit this has put them into overdrive because of the total turn around but I will be working on that and I feel as long as I keep it in check, and do not try to contact him it will be fine.

I think this was the absolute best scenario I could have asked for and am thankful for it. I feel very much at peace with no more bad feelings or worry.