Chugging Along

This is week two of no gambling.I have not had any urges to gamble until today, however, it was brief. What concerns me is that after time, when all is forgotten and there is money In the accounts once again, that pressing urge will rear its ugly head.I still have withdrawn into my corner and I really do not want to come out.Even though this is not face to face, I still am having problems opening up.What makes all this worse is the nagging realization of how much money Ihave lost and desperation to find and make it all up.Oh well, I made my bed so I might as well lay in it. 

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Hi Casino, good job on making it to week two. If that lil devil does come back to tempt you. Go back read what you wrote. Remember that feeling you had. I am not sure if that feeling will ever totally go away. I read other journals who have been GF for a long time and they say \"no urges\". I hope and pray that I can write that. You know what when I am feeling overwhlmed sometimes look for that emotional escape gambling gave me. I come back here read, write, and then read some more. Somtimes I am angry at myself over all the money, sometimes I am just angry at myself for being so selfish and foolish. I am trying to let it go. I think you have to, to move on. To build a better me! Keep up the GF! You can do this!
deleted_user
deleted_user

Feelbroken is right, we can never forget what we did, we must forgive ourselfs but never forget. I go back and read my journals everytime I get the urges and it helps to keep me gamble free. Read your read everyones and see the pain. You can do this I know you can.
Take Care Steph