Changes in life
When does a person know when your life going to change? When you are alone you tend to think more about life. I would say that. Started off this year great. After almost 3 years of talking on and off with this guy and told my gut that I'm going to say yes and going out with him. After meeting him the first time again. My feelings for him came back again. Maybe this time it will be good. Knowing that with him there is something that makes my heart melt for him is something that I have not had a feeling for in a long time. Started dating and enjoying see each other more. Guess the past couple of years I have had cold feet. Weird me? Anyways, started to be happy again and started to do things that I have not done in years.
The true test was when he started to work more and more hours to cover teaching. Being short handed on teachers is rough but we made it through that part. Meeting him for lunch was thing I look forward all the time. I would rearrange my schedule so I would have lunch. Times when I was working at him I would make sure that would happen. Times, we would get our time together. Usually, at night when the boys are sleeping. hahaha.
When my boys were able to met him they all feel in love with him. They loved on what he does (A&P instructor. They were able to look at air planes, engines, and what ever else he could find. They were at a point they wanted to start learning about the different air crafts.
I knew from this standpoint that I found someone that I loved and cared so much about. Came to a point that we ended up pregnant. This would of been his first child. Also know at that time with my health concerns. Ending up miscarrying. Worst thing in my life. Having dealt with this after trips to the er and being so sick so a couple weeks straight it was best. About 3 weeks ago found out again that we were pregnant. Ended up miscarrying again.
Knowing the facts and feelings starting to wonder maybe its time to go to the doctor to get my health recheck. I would love to have another child, Also worried about my children saying another sibling in the house. We can barely survive. A person always has those fears.
I left the air show yesterday to go and walk around for hours and having a friend met up with me to talk. Out here in 90 degree heat after misscarrying our second child. Stupid me. Being dizzy and sick most of the morning. I really didn't want to laydown all day and do nothing. I took off and told him I left. AFter, knowing that he would be upset. Really, didn't want to hurt him at all. In my heart I really needed someone to talk to. After, realizing on what I did yes I should of went back or said hey come over here to where I"m at. Which was in our favorite lunch spot. Point, after what happen and talking to her. Gave me a wake up call. When your trying to help and then you get pushed out when everyone came what did it the most. I felt after that I wasn't needed anymore. When you are talking with a person get someone else interrupts you makes worse.
That I love him so much. I love going to events with him to one see the love of my life. Two, spending time with him. Three, helping him so he is not stressing out so much, Four, being to help others.Five, we are suppose to be a team.
Guess, it may be hard for him knowing that I"m always willing to help as much as I can. I am always will to learn to help him make his life a little easier at the events.
Even my older boys ask if everything is okay. All, I wanted was to break down and cry and say I don't know if everything will be okay. Things that happen and hopefully get through it. They consider him as a father. They enjoy him being around and doing things with him. Learning from him is something they look forward each time.
They even talked about a while ago when he came home with 2 matching rings for us on when were going to make it official.
Guess, everybody has rough times. Hopefully, we will find out on what my health issues will tell me today when I visit the doctor to see on what my future as a parent will be.
Bye for know my Daily Strength Friends.
The true test was when he started to work more and more hours to cover teaching. Being short handed on teachers is rough but we made it through that part. Meeting him for lunch was thing I look forward all the time. I would rearrange my schedule so I would have lunch. Times when I was working at him I would make sure that would happen. Times, we would get our time together. Usually, at night when the boys are sleeping. hahaha.
When my boys were able to met him they all feel in love with him. They loved on what he does (A&P instructor. They were able to look at air planes, engines, and what ever else he could find. They were at a point they wanted to start learning about the different air crafts.
I knew from this standpoint that I found someone that I loved and cared so much about. Came to a point that we ended up pregnant. This would of been his first child. Also know at that time with my health concerns. Ending up miscarrying. Worst thing in my life. Having dealt with this after trips to the er and being so sick so a couple weeks straight it was best. About 3 weeks ago found out again that we were pregnant. Ended up miscarrying again.
Knowing the facts and feelings starting to wonder maybe its time to go to the doctor to get my health recheck. I would love to have another child, Also worried about my children saying another sibling in the house. We can barely survive. A person always has those fears.
I left the air show yesterday to go and walk around for hours and having a friend met up with me to talk. Out here in 90 degree heat after misscarrying our second child. Stupid me. Being dizzy and sick most of the morning. I really didn't want to laydown all day and do nothing. I took off and told him I left. AFter, knowing that he would be upset. Really, didn't want to hurt him at all. In my heart I really needed someone to talk to. After, realizing on what I did yes I should of went back or said hey come over here to where I"m at. Which was in our favorite lunch spot. Point, after what happen and talking to her. Gave me a wake up call. When your trying to help and then you get pushed out when everyone came what did it the most. I felt after that I wasn't needed anymore. When you are talking with a person get someone else interrupts you makes worse.
That I love him so much. I love going to events with him to one see the love of my life. Two, spending time with him. Three, helping him so he is not stressing out so much, Four, being to help others.Five, we are suppose to be a team.
Guess, it may be hard for him knowing that I"m always willing to help as much as I can. I am always will to learn to help him make his life a little easier at the events.
Even my older boys ask if everything is okay. All, I wanted was to break down and cry and say I don't know if everything will be okay. Things that happen and hopefully get through it. They consider him as a father. They enjoy him being around and doing things with him. Learning from him is something they look forward each time.
They even talked about a while ago when he came home with 2 matching rings for us on when were going to make it official.
Guess, everybody has rough times. Hopefully, we will find out on what my health issues will tell me today when I visit the doctor to see on what my future as a parent will be.
Bye for know my Daily Strength Friends.
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