Caught between rock and hard place
There are so many times where all I want to do is start yelling at both my boss and my co-worker to stop being upset by the fact that I want to do my own fucking job. But I am not allowed to because I will just be seen as the lesser sex and weak. But I can't do their jobs for them.
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Being a woman in a man's world can be really frustrating. Today, I am even more bothered by it. I am not allowed to change anything, because everyone else is only allowed to.
I get tired of having to placate everyone else's ego and allowing them to make me feel like I am replaceable. I get tired of them yelling at me or each other and then not being able to yell back. I get tired of hearing that my job is to save the company money, but not being able to do anything that will, and not having someone listen to me about ways to save the money. I get tired of my responsibilities being given and taken away on a weekly basis.
I am sad that I cannot do anything about it. Sure, I could quit, but it would take time to find new employment, and who knows whether it would be better or worse there. Right now, I am close to home, and I have a lot of freedom on whether I even need to be at work. The work is super easy, and I get to spend about 5 hours a day doing anything I want like filing my own taxes, or playing video games, or pretty much anything I want to do out of the 7 hours a day that I am at work. I mean if I had a stove and oven I would bake here...
Your job sounds super frustrating! Is it just the three of you in the office (i.e. are you the only woman there)? I wish you had another option, other than working there. Hugs.
@Ladybug7- Thank you.
There are 4 people most of the time. Technically, 5 because the owner's wife also works for the company doing social media, but she pretty much doesn't come into the office. Out of the 4 of us that are usually here, yes, I am the only woman. What is worse is that, when I am able to and allowed to do my job without everyone else's interference, I really enjoy my job. (Which unfortunately is probably only 10% of the time, if even that).
Hmmm....Today, I had an infuriating morning. Once again, I had people helping me do my job. It shouldn't be a big deal, but I get upset about it a lot... It is almost irrational anger. Today's anger made me think about why I get angry. I came up with that there is nothing that I do by myself. I am not the only one to pay bills, or place orders, or pay for them. I am not the only person who has access to the things that I utilize in my job. But if I were to do anyone else's job, I would get in trouble. I cannot sell for either Jason or Jeff, and I can hardly even talk to the clients... I don't take payments or deposits unless they aren't available. But Jason and Jeff can both do my job without even considering whether I am here to work or not...
Ugh... If only I could yell at everyone... They get into stuff that is mine... They try to do my job... I hate dealing with egos on top of it... Both of them (Owner and a co-worker that is the salesman) have the same attitude and want to be poor me... Salesman wants so badly to be in the middle of everything, but sucks at it... Owner wants to be poor me I am soo busy because I have to do everything and golf all the time...