Catching everyone up

Haven't been able to get online much lately, and thought I would write to catch everyone up on me.  First of all, I am still smoke FREEEEEEE!!!  Saturday will be FIVE MONTHS!  That is incredible.  I hope I'm not kidding myself, but I really feel this time it's a permanent change.  I have been around smokers lately and it doesn't bother me, and I don't hanker for one.  In fact, I kind of feel sorry for them and remember when I was enslaved like that.  I went to a spine specialist last Tuesday, and he recommended fusion surgery.  That's where they line the vertebrae back up, insert spacers in between, then screw a rod into the vertebrae to stabilize it all, and the idea is in about a year, it will all fuse together.  I go to a neurosurgeon of good repute this Friday (the 13th - tomorrow), and if he recommends the same surgery, I will allow him to do it.  The second LESI continues to keep the nerve pain at bay on the right side, but now I'm feeling the left side where the nerve compression is just moderate.  The dangerous thing, according to my PCP is, because of the nerve compression, I could end up with permanent damage, possibly dragging a foot or "pooping your pants" (and I quote!)  That is scary.  The idea of the surgery is scary.  The back pain support group here on DS is full of people with failed fusion surgeries.  I had to stop reading some of that, it was creating undue anxiety.  I have to remember there are plenty of people walking around with successful fusions, and they wouldn't be getting on a back pain support group site!  One of my fellow therapists had fusion and he said it was the best thing that ever happened to him.  My bro-in-law had neck fusion and is doing just fine.   My niece agrees to stay with me until I can get around.  Recovery time is 6 weeks - full healing takes a year.  One interesting thing I read was that smoking interferes with the healing process!  At least I won't have THAT to worry about.  I started PT this week and found out one of the stretching exercises I have been doing was contraindicated, and she told me to stop it at once!  Afterwards, I was sore and stiff, but now am gradually loosening back up.  She is having me do "relaxed posture" stretching - extension and flexion.  So far, so good.  Also, has modified some of the exercises for the pool and recommended I spend as much time there as possible, which of course I am!  Walking she says is ok, but around a track, which frankly is not what I want to be doing in this heat, but maybe I'll get back out there at some point soon.  I do want to be in the best shape I can be for if I have to have this surgery.  My emotional and mental states have improved for the most part, although I still get a bit cranky and crabby when I've had a painful day.  My niece and I had an interesting conversation a few days back.  She's VEGAN and I'm a CARNIVORE.  We apparantely had both been thinking about how I could eat meat that first week.  I said I might could put a microwave in my room somehow and just warm up pre-frozen pre-made meat dishes.  She allowed as how she could probably stomach doing that, and had thought about bringing me her George Foreman grill (from her former meat-eating days) and would be able to stomach putting frozen chicken breasts on the grill and cooking them.  For now, still taking one day at a time, somewhat nervous about the visit tomorrow.  At least I can TALK about the surgery now, at first I couldn't.  Now I've been drawing diagrams for my patients and explaining it all in great detail.  Those of you who pray, please keep me in your prayers.  Thanks for your continued support.  Keep the faith, and keep up the great quits!