Carrying On

I am still wondering what it is that keeps me so up,it has 2 be God,Jesus Christ & The Holy Spirit!I can see no other logical explanation 4 it.I am ministering only 2 myself now,as every friend & family member I have in the world has turned their backs on me.Maybe this has something 2 do with the fact that I am FINALLY accepting how 2 look after only me,every1 else seems completely disinterested in the updates that I was giving daily.Money seems 2 be a big factor also,knowing that I have none may explain the apathy 4 the most part.The Good Lord's & God's & The Holy Spirits' omnipresence is so comforting that I never feel alone or lonely,even when I am constantly spurned by family members & what I used 2 call friends.People are so different nowadays,it scares me 2 think what Judgement would be like if It came 2morrow,there would not be very many around,but at least they would all be honest!All of these people that say they are with God,& it is nothing but a cover is really starting 2 get under my skin,but Jesus says it is not up 2 me 2 expose all of the fraud being perpetrated on a daily basis,He will take care of them.I am only a messenger spreading The Good Word of Love & Peace.A job still remains elusive 2 me,but my patience still needs work,I guess.These are the signs & hints that I am receiving now,keep up the search,your patience will be rewarded.It is just so very difficult 2 keep a smile & a brave countenance when I know full well that no1 on this Earthly Plane is along with me.There are people out there of like mind,& it is only a matter of time until I have found some of them.There is a man coming 2 Edmonton 2 speak next month,but I would have 2 meet with him face 2 face be4 I can tell if he is honest or not.All every 1 does is spout off about this book he wrote,how many copies he has sold,notice there is no mention of where his books are in print,how many copies are in print globally,if he is philanthropic at all or if any of his writings have made a difference in how many people have accepted God as a result of his writings,you get where I am going with this?My talent 4 sniffing out dishonesty has been getting ever sharper as my head slowly clears from pain.Only codeine on board consistently now,cesamet was way 2 strong 2 keep a clear head 4 writing.INR is consistent around 2.5 again,which is a welcome relief after the bleeding gums I had the other weekend.I put the cane away 4 good about 2 weeks ago now & have no future plans 2 pick it back up,unless ABSOLUTELY necessary!Just going 2 keep on the Righteous path,He is leading me all the way,Brothers & Sisters!I am still quite unsure of my home church,alot of mixed signals is what I continue 2 get,the people who give me dirty looks are a thorn in my side constantly.All I need 2 do is keep my direction headed 4ward,no backward steps 4 this guy,ever again,no 2nd guessing!spinelessinalbertaJustKeepSmilin':)JesusSaves! P2