candy canes...sadness,,, christmas

Well I finally got to the cemetary yesterday christmas day and brought Paul and Tracy their Candycanes... How I wish that they were still with me.  The sadness is unbearable at times and I keep wondering why?????  I loved my kids.. they were great kids.... I was so proud of them as people and so proud of the young people they had become...Paul was a football player and good... Tracy was a cheerleader and also good... competative cheering  and the two of them remarkable young people.... and now.. they are gone... but hell they aren't forgotten... People friends of theirs still keep in contact from time to time and still tell me that they miss them.  You know when I see their friends....that are now married and having kids I can't help but think I've been so ripped off.... Yes ... I still have my youngest girl Tammy is her name.... and she is the light of my life... without her... don't know what I would do.... But I think of how she went from being the baby to being an only child and how unfair that is.... she should still have her big brother and her sister and she doesn't... but... now she has her two girls... and they are amazing little girls..some of their mannerisms take us back sometimes cus they are so much like Paul and Tracy... Little gifts from above... lol...... I read in here at the DS site and some of what I read pulls at my heart strings... I mean really pulls... I find it hard to believe that some people treat their loved ones so badly... so badly that the loved one feels unloved, unwanted and useless.... It scares me to think that people who are not worth the time of day  (the abusers)   get away with this.... and then I wonder how can I help.... Is there any way... I don't want to intrude on anybody's life.... but it kills me to think that people can be so mean/evil to a child... and make the child feel so badly... what kind of a warped human being... (using the term human being loosely) can do that to somebody.... what will happen to the child... and how can I help.... Where is this child's safe place.... where is his haven... ..Okay gotta go... getting too emotional.... God Bless...