Can't Talk About it

I was raped by my best friend 3 years ago. It took me 2 years to be able to accept what had happened to me. I didn't want to believe and I tried so hard to convince myself it didn't. I never talked to anyone about it because I was too scared to. I thought they would tell me it was my fault, that I should've fought harder or screamed. I just froze. I told him no and he told me he just wanted to see how far it'll go in. I was 15 years old. I know I need to talk to someone about this but I can't form the words, it's too hard. How do I deal with this? It happened 3 years ago and I feel like it just happened yesterday.