Can\'t Sleep..Stuck in a Mental Mass of Confusion
Last night I couldn't sleep. I also couldn't breathe for some weird reason. I thought I was going to get panic attacks again, but I didn't get the usual tingling feeling and darkened vision that I normally get when I have one, so I wasn't as worried. I went to bed at 2am and didn't fall asleep until 6:30am! I only had 2 & 1/2 hours of sleep and for some reason, my mind is so full of worries. I know I shouldn't feel like this, but I feel old and just having the same old feeling of not ever finding that someone. I guess it's because I don't go out. The thing is, I don't have anyone to go out with. I only have a few friends that call me a few times a month and these friends have families and their own lives. There's people at school, but most of the kids there are barely out of high school or not around my age. Don't get me wrong, I'm friendly to everyone, but generally, I know it's more satisfying when you're friends with someone you have alot in common with. I'm just really sad and have been for the past couple of days. Also, because I haven't been able to enjoy the two weeks of vacation I have because I had to run so many errands and school starts in 4 days!! What I truely wish for is to go on a trip to New York with a few good friends for a week!! I wish I could've done that, but I have no friends to go out with or that would go out with me for a trip. I really don't know what to do. I keep hoping, but hoping isn't getting me anywhere.
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Do you have any hobbies that you can pursue and meet people that way? Don\'t laugh, but I\'ve read comic books my entire life and a few years ago, I started posting at an internet message board for people who read comics. About five years later, I still post with the same people, and we\'ve all become pretty good friends. We live all over the country (there are four or so who live in my town, Washington, DC), and every year, we all take a trip together to a (get ready) comic book convention. It\'s a blast. Last year we went to NYC. The year before that, we went to Charlotte. And the year before that was Chicago. The granddaddy of them all, the San Diego Comicon, looms large on our list of places to go next.
I\'m actually headed to NYC for a weekend away tomorrow and I\'m staying with a friend I met on one of those sites. We\'re really close friends now.
Maybe there are some student groups you can join at your school? If you\'re politically oriented and the election gets your motor running, I\'m sure there are bunches of groups that run activities like voter registration and campaign activities. You can meet tons of good people that way.
When I was in school, I was interested in a lot of activist stuff and I joined some student groups that shared my interest. Many years later, my best friends from college are generally all people I met through those groups.