Breaking the Cycle

I want to grow and learn and be a better person, for myself more than anything. I am so sad that all I grew up around was abuse and that is all I learned, so my personal behaviors in my early adult life have been abusive, especially in relationships. Even though my patterns were subtle and never intentional, just didn't know any better because some things were so normal in my up bringing, they seemed normal to me until I had to deal with the consequences of self sabotaging relationships and never knowing why. 
To this day, I am getting better. I have learned not to blame people or make them feel guilty during disagreements and put everything on them with out accepting responsibility. I have learned, or at least I am learning how to not react to anger with more anger. I am learning to express feelings in a way that doesn't put blame or shame on anyone else. And above all, I am learning not to take things personally. As well as learning when to walk away from abusive situations. Whether I am the abuser or the victim of abuse. 
Astrology is a tool I personally use to help me since the path I have chosen as a professional astrologer helps to give me insight into a lot of my inner workings, as well as being able to make accurate predictions of future challenges that I can prepare myself for. 
 
I plan to use this journal to call myself out any time I fall back into unconscious patters. As well as writing when I am faced with challenges that would normally pull those reactions out of me, but instead choosing to create new neural pathways and choose different reactions to challenging situations.