Blind Sided

I love movies and I often use them to escape the realities of the world. Last night it did not work out that way as I watched "The Blind side". If you have not seen it, the movie is the true story of how Michael Oher went from being a homeless teen to a star in the NFL. I was watching it last night and there is a scene where Michael is roaming the bleachers of a gymnasium after a game, picking up bags of popcorn left by the spectators. I began to cry because just two years ago I lived the same way.
 
For several months in my life, I had no food in the house. I would dig in the back of my pantry and find a 4 year old box of mac and cheese, wash the bugs off the pasta and eat it. I begged my parents to give me a bag of flour and some shortening and after dark I would pick up apples out of my neighbor's yard and make a pie. To me it was not stealing because the apples just laid on the ground for deer or to rot anyway. I would bake a pie and slice it into four pieces - one for each day to eat. I always waited until as late in the day as possible to eat so I would not be hungry going to sleep. I went out with friends sometimes on weekends and ordered glasses of water from the bar. My friends sometimes would buy me a coke. Sometimes they would as me to join them for breakfast at 2 am and pay for my meal. I remember one night my friend Jennifer left half her food on her plate and I swallowed my pride and asked her if I could take it home to have the next day. Another time there were too many people that joined us and I was too ashamed to ask, but she had it boxed up and handed it to me outside. But there were also things I learned to do without - toothpaste, shaving creme, razors, deodorant, toilet paper. Things we take for granted. But by far, the part that got to me was the food.
 
So last night I sat crying at the sight of Michael Oher, picking up half-eaten bags of popcorn. But I was not crying for the hungry. I cried because it's an American tragedy, one that I know now and understand better than before, and because I am powerless to do anything about it. There's also a scene in the movie where Oher's adopted mother is told in praise, "You have changed that boy's life". She replies, "No, he's changed mine". That is so, so true. There is no greater feeling than acting in kindness to help someone in need. I know because I once did a lot of it, back when I made more money than I could spend. Just 4 years ago I gave all I could to local people who's house had burnt down in a fire, or who's kid was suffering from cancer. I cry now because I am penniless and can't do those things. And so I have resolved that I am too smart to just let that pass me by. I am going to think of a way to help people despite my situation or die trying.