~~~Blessings To All ~~~~

I just wanted to take a few to sit here and do alittle writing,and to give everyone an update on how i am
doing its been a rough one for me to be honest, i have had alot going on, i havent been feeling well as of
late  i have been dealing with my ups and downs as well as just not feeling well health wise in general.
My Viral load is currently now undetectable which is good , and my CD4 is now up to 800 and holding
steady, but my emotional state on the other hand is not doing so good, i am dealing now with alot of
anger and trying very hard to keep it under control.I have noticed more and more i am starting to shut
down and push others away,and starting to stay to myself more as well ,i am dealing with alot of personal
things in my life right now and i just celebrated my 46th birthday, i think the whole thing right now
for me is it is finally hitting me just exactly what is what with this disease. I am trying  to stay and be
positive not just for myself but for my family for it has been very hard  on my Family. i have tryed very
hard to let my family have the opportunity to understand where i am at in my life and where i stand.
There are times where i just want to crawl under a rock and hide but i cant for i have obligations and
responsabilities to take care of so i am now trying to leave all of this in Gods hands for him to Direct
me in the way i need to go even tho at times i feel like just giving up, but i know i cant, for he has
a purpose for me and i have a job to fulfill, some might be good but then again some might be not so
good but all in all who and what i am will work itself out with Gods help.but anyway enough of my
Ranting i wish everyone a Blessed Day and hope all my friends on here and Extended Family have a
awesome weekend.