Beta 2.0..waiting for results

Had the blood test, probably about 2hours until I find out the results. I know this sounds stupid given the odds and it scares me to say it. I think it could be a positive. Which makes me really afraid because its probably a negative and I will be so devastated..not to mention how stupid I will feel. Ugh, I feel sick thinking about it now. I should never have allowed myself to entertain the possibility of a positive. Why oh why do we do this to ourselves??