Been sick and not happy

Hey, just checking in after a few days of not signing on....I've been sick with the worst cold I've had in ages.I went to the store earlier this afternoon and realized I hadn't been out of the house for 3 days! I've just been sleeping and trying to breath and coughing in between. Oh, ya, and taking pain killers for the headache I keep getting. Yuk.Fortunately, Andrew had his 2 days off this week so he's taken care of the few things that couldn't wait, ran errands for me, checked the mail and answered the phone while I slept. He's a good kid. Thank God.On the Sarah front....not good.I've been working on taking her off the meds or lowering doses that the hospital Dr. had told me to work on. First one was a mood stabilizer and I knew within a week of her being off completely that it had obviously been doing some good. I tried to wait it out and see if she stabilized...no such luck. I put her back on a half dose. That helped somewhat, but I was still waiting to see how much when things turned ugly...real ugly.This week has been so bad that I'm putting her back up to where she was and quickly. I CANNOT live with her like this. The last 2 nights have been so bad that I have been up to 4:30 - 5 o'clock in the morning with her while she spews all kinds of nasty accusations and opinions at me. She has false memories, delusions and has accused me of abuse! - all because I wasn't catering to her like she wanted! and all this on top of being sick myself.Oh, and she accused me of playing that up for sympathy and the other night when I couldn't breath, I was "wheezing too loud and I was annoying her".I can't take much more of this. Taking her off her meds has been eye opening. I see how sick she really is without her meds and it's breaking my heart.Plus I'm dreading tonight.(her moods all happen at night....it's her particular cycle....plus her "energy" goes up hence the late nights/early mornings)