Been a long time
Haven't written a journal in a long time. Thought I'd give it another shot. i still can't trust people. I found some great friends here, but it is only in emails. My boss is whacked. Wanted to fire me in November and now is treating me like his buddy. Have other people always looking over me waiting for me to mess up.
Whenever someone compliments me I can't seem to except it. This goes back years to when I was a busboy and was doing great. The boss complimented me at doing such a great job. Later that night I dropped a tray of glasses. There have been other times like this, so I now reject all compliments in hopes that I can keep the bad spirits away from me so I don't mess something up. But I slip and let it happen.
I never had parents who praised me. Never encouraged me to try things. I am not one looking for compliments or praise, but maybe the lack of it in childhood makes me get all out of focus and that's why I screw up. I do wish I would get recognition for my efforts at work. I would like something to show that I have achieved something in life. But then if I fail it will make the fall that much harder.
I guess I will just continue to be an unnoticed nobody.
Whenever someone compliments me I can't seem to except it. This goes back years to when I was a busboy and was doing great. The boss complimented me at doing such a great job. Later that night I dropped a tray of glasses. There have been other times like this, so I now reject all compliments in hopes that I can keep the bad spirits away from me so I don't mess something up. But I slip and let it happen.
I never had parents who praised me. Never encouraged me to try things. I am not one looking for compliments or praise, but maybe the lack of it in childhood makes me get all out of focus and that's why I screw up. I do wish I would get recognition for my efforts at work. I would like something to show that I have achieved something in life. But then if I fail it will make the fall that much harder.
I guess I will just continue to be an unnoticed nobody.
Replies
Sorry to hear you aren\'t receiving the compliments which you deserve. There is a forum here-created by the member Bill...it is titled helping-with-the-housework,but we try to keep each other encouraged on anything we do,because everyone deserves praise not just critizism all the time
Low self esteem just sucks! I can understand how you feel and it is hard when we have low self worth, we crave that validation that we are ok from others. I don\'t know how to fix this completely but for myself, affirmations, belief in God and being the best person I can be gives me value from within.