Baptism

The river was over the banks and threatening the town. The Baptist Minister decided to hold a revival rally to increase Faith in the area. He was certain that God would save the town if everyone prayed in great Faith for the river to recede. He selected a site near the rising water and began to preach. People came in droves. Everyone in the town, save but one attended. Seeing an opportunity, the town drunk helped himself to the contents of the local watering hole. Completely blind drunk, he staggered to the river. He found to his surprise there was a line to the river. Never wanting to miss out on something special, he queued up with the rest. When he reached the river, he found the Minister baptizing people. He and the Minister locked gazes. The Minister was shocked to see the town drunk ready for baptism and asked him, "Do you want to find the Lord?" The drunk replied, "Yes. I can find the Lord." "Come here, my son, and find the Lord!" The drunk waded into the chest-high water to where the minister waited and took a deep breath. The Minister pushed him under the water and raised him up, saying, "Did you find the Lord?" The drunk replied, "No. No. I didn't." Nonplussed, the minister pushed him under again, raised him up and cried out, "Did you find the Lord?" The drunk replied again, "No I didn't." Frustrated with this reticent soul, the minister pushed him under again, raised him up and shouted, "Did you find the Lord?" The soggy drunk replied, "Are you sure this is where he went under?"