Back to my childhood
Today was devastating.
I got a call from my sibling to say I should come over to my parents place. And there he was agressive, trying to beat my mother. All siblings trying to pull him away. Why? My sibling found evidence yet again of his unfaithfulness... Different women. 35 years of denying making us seem as if we are crazy - lies after lies. How can someone blatantly lie and believe it when the evidence is as clear as daylight? Why has he never owned up or apologised? Why doesn't he just pack up and leave? My mother devastated as she watched her children in fear of this man. I called the police and he ran after me trying to pull me by the hair while i clutched onto my 6 month old boy...
The pain of my childhood flooded back. My mother tells us she is strong it's okay, she's not afraid of him...
Each one of his children is damaged.
I got a call from my sibling to say I should come over to my parents place. And there he was agressive, trying to beat my mother. All siblings trying to pull him away. Why? My sibling found evidence yet again of his unfaithfulness... Different women. 35 years of denying making us seem as if we are crazy - lies after lies. How can someone blatantly lie and believe it when the evidence is as clear as daylight? Why has he never owned up or apologised? Why doesn't he just pack up and leave? My mother devastated as she watched her children in fear of this man. I called the police and he ran after me trying to pull me by the hair while i clutched onto my 6 month old boy...
The pain of my childhood flooded back. My mother tells us she is strong it's okay, she's not afraid of him...
Each one of his children is damaged.
Replies
So sorry you are hurting honey.
Big hugs sweet heart.
I know this is just another test to get me off that straight path. To trick me feeling helpless and to fall back into it. But I won\'t sway! NO. I am stronger. Even though my H is not interested and I have nobody else to talk to. My siblings are in denial they try to push it away and pretend because we know couple of days from now mum and dad make up as if nothing has happened and they continue their fake happy lives of materialism and nothing more. That was painful to say. I\'m not blaming my mum but a broken home is not only when divorce occurs , it\'s a home where children are repeatedly exposed to an unhealthy relationship... 30 years of this ... Waking up in fear. Being controlled.
I grew up in a house like that... but my mom didn\'t believe in divorce so she stuck with it til my dad died (he was hit by a car at 42 yrs old) I was pregnant with my first child at the time. Didn\'t cry at all at his funeral.
My heart goes out to you.
Wow Clovermoon...I am sorry to hear this...same here, mom does not believe in divorce nor my dad. Yet he threatens to leave ALL the time. He\'s disowned me more times than he\'s ever expressed care for his children especially the girls. My brothers have been so spoiled by him over the years that alone did all his kids harm...
i don\'t hate my dad. I feel sorry for him. I want him to seek help and I\'d support him. But what I won\'t tolerate is him threatening or hurting us. Life on earth was never meant to be perfect- this is only the journey to our eternal, ever-perfect destination.
The day over the weekend perfectly coincided with the day my H had to give a lecture in the same area my Ex-AP and I went to on one of our \'rendezvous\'.... so as to be expected he was emotionally unavailable and distraught. Yet, i know he was trying still to be supportive of me.. I\'m really hanging onto the little things... last night he held me briefly and rubbed my back and I wept so softly (don\'t think he heard)..... all this that\'s been happening I know there\'s a higher purpose... i strongly believe in this... reflection and growth is important in life. We need to understand that relationships, our spouses, our kids, our wealth, success everything.. are gifts. they are temporary and it will cause much pain if we attach ourselves too much to this world.
Clovermoon, everything happens for a reason and I am sure it\'s made your mother stronger in most ways?