Back to it then...

Well, back to the drawing board. Maybe this month will be the month my journey begins. Trying to stick on the positive side. My immune system is not cooperating though. I keep getting these horrendous sinus infections! Boo. Starting tomorrow, I am back on a strict paleo diet and crossfitting it up. Would really like to lose 15 pounds before I get pregnant, but of course conceiving my rainbow baby is my first priority, so I am just focusing on being healthy. However, I think dropping the weight will boost my spirits (and who knows, maybe my fertility as I am slightly overweight right now). Nothing brings you down quicker than feeling self conscious and unhappy with your own body! I am feeling hopeful again. I just struggle so much that last week before my period. At least I am regular, God help me if I wasn't :) Right now I need prayer as my newest nephew, Zeke, is due any day now and I am SOOOO nervous. I can no longer trust in a healthy pregnancy to mark the expectation of a healthy birth. That really stinks too. I am a nervous wreck the longer pregnancies go, which typically is a good thing...oh well. Signing off now.

P.S. Check out my new picture I uploaded. My son really is beautiful. I dream about what his smile and eyes would look like. I will know one day...