Back home again

It is good to be home.  Thank you for the kind words and hugs.  I appreciated the caring and understanding from everyone.
It has been a stressful week. Thankfully Andrew, my son was with me and was a pillar of strength.  I don't know what I would have done without him.
The funeral went as well as a funeral could go.  I felt the need to do the eulogy (very bizarre for me).  When I mentioned it to my nephew (he is the takeover type and my sister allows it) said "No, we have arranged for the minister to do it".  They said the minister would be over that afternoon to get the information.  He was a lovely man who did not know my brother.  He mentioned that it would be so much better for a family member to do it.  John (nephew) looked at me and said "You said you could do it".  I said "Absolutely".  He thanked me profusely before and after the funeral!!
I gathered the family together to tell me stories of Robert and wrote it up that night on my friend's computer to present the next day at the funeral.  I wanted Andrew to edit it as he is a writer and editor.  So in the morning, I got the computer out and logged on to it.  The screen went blank.  Nothing.  Pirjo (friend) fiddled with it, Andrew fiddled with it - nothing.  So Andrew got his computer out.  it was sloooow.  He was convinced he would have to get a new computer when he got home as his job is writing!  I did start to dictate another eulogy.  in the meantime, Pirjo went to see the neighbor who is a computer geek.  He suggested trying another cord and lent her one.  Presto, the original was up.  Andrew is a good editor but not speedy.  We got to the funeral just in time.
I am certain that Lisa and Robert were messing with us.  I am also sure they were there with me when I read it.  I felt so comfortable.  One of Robert's hunting buddies came up to me later and told me that he wished I'd have kept on talking. 
I wish all had ended well however, I made the mistake of asking my nephew (executor) about the will.  I didn't get a chance to say that I mainly wanted to ensure that Cevyn gets whatever would have been left to Lisa - not Harvey.  All Hell broke loose.  I won't go in to detail but, except for one niece who has always been a troublemaker and instigator, we sorted things out.  I suspect there are still people there who think i am only interested in money but I can't help that. My nephew and I had a chat afterwards - I still do not like him but we agreed that emotions were high and although he never did share the contents of the will, he assured me that it would be handled as Robert would want. 
I really could have picked a better time.  I just thought that we were all together and the rest of the family wanted to know what was in the will - I didn't think it was going to cause a riot.  They are all afraid of John so, even though they get upset with him and don't trust him,  they won't confront him. 
So I am back home to my quiet life.  My family is getting smaller and smaller.  My sister is very frail and has considerable memory loss due to mini strokes so I worry about her.  Joe says "We are at that age".   
Lisa and Robert:  I could feel you with me - that was a bit of a trick you played on us but thank you for giving me the courage and serenity to do the eulogy.  And thank you for 'fixing' Andrew's computer when he got home.  He says it is working just fine now!  I  miss you always and love you forever.