BABY STEPS.......
I set a goal for myself to be able to save enough money for Austin, Shelby, and Myself to go to Disneyland by Feb 2012. I made some extra money tonight staying late for a parent who couldn't get to school on time. The late fees were $60.00. So I came home and put it in the Disney Jar. Austin really wanted to go to McDonalds but I said no we have to SACRIFICE NOW TO GET THE REWARD OF Disney later. I know $60.00 isn't much now but I can build on it everything starts off small but if you build on it how fast it can grow.
I really thought about this tonight how through my 23 years of marriage our family started of small and grew. Our home started off small and grew. Our cars started off small and grew. Our DEBT started off small and GREW!!! The thing is though I thought Our LOVE for each other started off small and GREW bigger as we grew and learned new things about each other as we got older and our kids were growing up. This was supposed to be the start of "OUR TIME" as Brandon and Shelby have grown up and our on there own and Austin is becoming a big boy now he likes to watch himself if I run to the store ect... My point is that this was OUR TIME TOGETHER NOW TO REDISCOVER EACH OTHER AGAIN. THIS WAS NOT THE TIME FOR HIM TO JUST GO REDISCOVER HIMSELF.
I guess I feel really CHEATED because for 23 years I made all the sacrifices I put in the time and effort and LOVE AND SUPPORT. SO HERE I AM ALL THE SACRIFICES AND NO REWARDS. I will always be thankful for my children that's for sure. But sometimes I feel like I have been sitting in front of this great big SLOT MACHINE for 23 years just putting everything I had into it waiting for it to pay off and guess what???????????????????? IT JUST NEVER DID. I mean everyone knows that feeling when your at the casino right. You just keep putting into it all your time, all your energy, all your money, all your love, because you want and hope and wish so badly it will PAY OFF RIGHT. Then when it doesn't and you CRAP OUT HOW DO YOU FEEL????? LIKE YOU JUST WASTED YOUR WHOLE NIGHT RIGHT??? Sometimes I feel like I have 23 years of wasted nights.
I really thought about this tonight how through my 23 years of marriage our family started of small and grew. Our home started off small and grew. Our cars started off small and grew. Our DEBT started off small and GREW!!! The thing is though I thought Our LOVE for each other started off small and GREW bigger as we grew and learned new things about each other as we got older and our kids were growing up. This was supposed to be the start of "OUR TIME" as Brandon and Shelby have grown up and our on there own and Austin is becoming a big boy now he likes to watch himself if I run to the store ect... My point is that this was OUR TIME TOGETHER NOW TO REDISCOVER EACH OTHER AGAIN. THIS WAS NOT THE TIME FOR HIM TO JUST GO REDISCOVER HIMSELF.
I guess I feel really CHEATED because for 23 years I made all the sacrifices I put in the time and effort and LOVE AND SUPPORT. SO HERE I AM ALL THE SACRIFICES AND NO REWARDS. I will always be thankful for my children that's for sure. But sometimes I feel like I have been sitting in front of this great big SLOT MACHINE for 23 years just putting everything I had into it waiting for it to pay off and guess what???????????????????? IT JUST NEVER DID. I mean everyone knows that feeling when your at the casino right. You just keep putting into it all your time, all your energy, all your money, all your love, because you want and hope and wish so badly it will PAY OFF RIGHT. Then when it doesn't and you CRAP OUT HOW DO YOU FEEL????? LIKE YOU JUST WASTED YOUR WHOLE NIGHT RIGHT??? Sometimes I feel like I have 23 years of wasted nights.
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Love the analogy of life and the slot machine. This is the reason why I DON\'T GAMBLE! When they brought KENO to Maryland and those stupid screens were in every bar and restaurant, I often thought that one would be just as far ahead of the game if they drove around town and just tossed money out the window! I\'ve never felt like I had \"money to burn\" and have never felt particularly \"lucky\" either. My Dad told me early on that life is enough of a gamble -- why waste your hard-earned money on something else that is NOT a \"sure thing.\" Wise man, my Dad!