Anxiety Program Day 1

My anxiety is keeping me from doing a lot of things lately I am no longer a functioning depressed person as I have been since childhood. I have a lot of dreams and goals and I can no longer let my anxiety and depression keep me back. I can't afford a good therapist right now and I have no car and there is no way I'm going to take a bus to the community clinic. So I've come up with this program hopefully it will work each day I will tackle a different issue on my list.
1. Read 
2. Journal
3. EFT Vid
4. Emotional release hypnosis 
5. Anxiety hypnosis vid    
* Did not have normal relationships with family.
My main coping mechanism as a kid was avoidance got so good at it I managed to avoid myself. I had no idea who I was or how I felt. The anger and sadness and fear i had down pretty good though. Only felt happy when doing fun distracting things. Couldn't focus on school work, couldn't finish anything, never realized how broken I was. I lived with my deaf mother who was in her own world, and I was always so happy to be around the rest of the family at get togethers I guess thats why they never caught on.
I have a lot of anger towards them, the closeness I see they have for each other and never had with me and my mom and my sister. But I know people have a lot in life to deal with and I just did not have the tools to be a part of a family but soon I will. It wasn't an easy cituation for either of us, but I have been grappling with my anger. How you could think a deaf woman in lala land should be taking care of kids i'll never understand, i guess i have some misplaced anger its not thier fault although they could have prevented it or seen i was hurting. Instead they ignored me or made fun or used me. No no misplaced anger.
I am learning about emotional intelligence and getting in contact with myself soon this will no longer be an issue.

Replies

DoctorKoopa
DoctorKoopa

How did you come up with this? um sorry I am sure this is a dumb questoin but what does EFT mean? I sincerely hope that it works I might have to borrow it for myself
Runamok
Runamok

Dude I did it last night with the first issue I wanted to tackle and its like magic but you really have to be honest in your journal. Its a big one though I may have to do it one more time. here\'s the links for everthing they\'re all free but if you can pay for it I bet his other stuff is better. Keep in mind i just came up with it and only tried it once and i am not a health care professional.

http://www.ehow.com/video_4399358_basics-emotional-freedom-techniques-__eft_.html

http://www.freehypnosistreatment.com/emotionalreleasehypnosis.html

http://www.freehypnosistreatment.com/anxietyhypnosis.html