Another vent.......
This morning i woke up with a headache. It pretty much sucks
This is my second day without getting reassurance first thing in the morning and it sucks. I feel so dizzy this morning. I woke up with a headache which is getting worse by the hour. My vision is really fuzzy and weird and i cant concentrate or focus on anything. It scares me. I hate feeling this way. It scares me that i am having a stroke. No one will reassure me that im not having a stroke anymore and that is very frustrating and makes me extremely anxious. I feel like i need that reassurance to get me through the day and right now i am not getting it from ANYONE. Everybody ignores me when i ask them if i am having a stroke and it is frustrating and it makes me very angry. I know theyre probably very sick of hearing about it and in a way i guess i can understand that because i wouldnt want to hear about the same thing over and over again, but its just so hard to keep it to myself because the OCD acts up on me when i dont do it. And my anxiety goes sky high like it is right now when i dont ask for reassurance. Im starting to realize that nobody is going to give it to me anymore and that hurts a lot. I dont know what i am going to do when i dont get the reassurance that im not having a stroke anymore. Strokes really scare me, and i need to know that im not going to die from one, even though deep down i know i am not. I just still need to hear it from other people. It makes me feel better, but it really sucks when i cant get the reassurance that im not having a stroke.
I dont know what to do with myself right now. I am extremely anxious and frustrated!! I wish that i could just reassurance myself that im not having a stroke and that that would be enough but thats not the case. Its never enough when i reassurance myself that i am not having a stroke, and i think its because i dont trust myself to believe that im not having a stroke. I dont know. But i wish i could just get rid of this obsession once and for all. I think if it were gone i would be so happy and i also think that my migraine auras wouldnt scare me anymore when i do get them. I hope this obsession leaves me alone pretty soon, because i dont know how much longer i can deal with feeling angry when i dont get reassurance and feeling anxious when i dont get the reassurance that i think i need to get through the day.
This is my second day without getting reassurance first thing in the morning and it sucks. I feel so dizzy this morning. I woke up with a headache which is getting worse by the hour. My vision is really fuzzy and weird and i cant concentrate or focus on anything. It scares me. I hate feeling this way. It scares me that i am having a stroke. No one will reassure me that im not having a stroke anymore and that is very frustrating and makes me extremely anxious. I feel like i need that reassurance to get me through the day and right now i am not getting it from ANYONE. Everybody ignores me when i ask them if i am having a stroke and it is frustrating and it makes me very angry. I know theyre probably very sick of hearing about it and in a way i guess i can understand that because i wouldnt want to hear about the same thing over and over again, but its just so hard to keep it to myself because the OCD acts up on me when i dont do it. And my anxiety goes sky high like it is right now when i dont ask for reassurance. Im starting to realize that nobody is going to give it to me anymore and that hurts a lot. I dont know what i am going to do when i dont get the reassurance that im not having a stroke anymore. Strokes really scare me, and i need to know that im not going to die from one, even though deep down i know i am not. I just still need to hear it from other people. It makes me feel better, but it really sucks when i cant get the reassurance that im not having a stroke.
I dont know what to do with myself right now. I am extremely anxious and frustrated!! I wish that i could just reassurance myself that im not having a stroke and that that would be enough but thats not the case. Its never enough when i reassurance myself that i am not having a stroke, and i think its because i dont trust myself to believe that im not having a stroke. I dont know. But i wish i could just get rid of this obsession once and for all. I think if it were gone i would be so happy and i also think that my migraine auras wouldnt scare me anymore when i do get them. I hope this obsession leaves me alone pretty soon, because i dont know how much longer i can deal with feeling angry when i dont get reassurance and feeling anxious when i dont get the reassurance that i think i need to get through the day.
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