Another step

Well as the title says, another step on my journey. I was convinced I was having milder versions of the same symptoms of my first PE. I started tingling all over, my face went numb and I felt a weird sensation in my chest. I stayed calm to the point of detachment, phoned my gp who said come straight down for an ecg and then phoned hubby telling him to be calm but I thought it was happening again and to come home.I then went to have a wash, I always feel I have to be as clean as possible when I see a dr. My nan used to say always wear clean knickers, I think I just took it a stage further. Anyway I am feeling dizzy and forcing myself to focus, I didn't panic in the least but I did wonder if I would be able to make it down my stairs this time (I live in a flat) Hubby came home and took me to the gp's surgery where they were all waiting for me. I had my ecg which showed my heart was fast but nothing else. Because my gp knows I hate making a fuss and for me to be there meant something was wrong he took me very seriously and sent me straight back to the hospital where I'd been thrombolysed. I was put into a waiting area and assessed by a nurse who took pity on me and found me a bed. I saw 2 dr's in the space of and hour and was moved to a bedded area while they decided what to do with me. They did blood tests and then said they were going to keep me overnight so they could do 1 at 8am the following morning. My veins were playing hide and seek again so I am back to being bruised from all the attempts at bleeding me :-/ Friday morning... vampire lady comes round and eventually takes blood from my hand. A doctor came at about 11 and said that they don't like to do ct scans if there's a way round it because of radiation. She said that there might not be much difference in the clot.. I said err what clot? When I was thrombolysed I thought it got rid of all the clot, she said they don't usually scan afterwards but the drug was a wonder drug that blasted the clot into manageable bits for the body to dispose of but it wasn't a super wonder drug that got rid completely. I was absolutely stunned, I thought this thing was out of me and it was a shock to realise that bits of it were probably still there. I got over it though, my main worry was now if it had got bigger or if another had formed.A nurse came back 30 minutes later and said they were going to scan me early afternoon. I waited.. waited.. waited and at 5.20 a dr came to say the scanner had broken and I would be done the next day. I resigned myself to another night in hospital, Daz went to get my meds from home and came back about 7. At 7.30 a nurse came and asked me if I was ready for my scan.. they'd decided to do me after all. I lay on the bench while the giant polo took all the pictures and memories of early december came flooding back. I started crying, couldn't help it I just felt so lonely and couldn't face going through it all over again. The radiologist was lovely, talked to me through the intercom and kept me going.I was taken back to my bed and waited for just under 2 hours for the results. I was torn between wanting to know and the dread if it was another clot. Thank god it wasn't, I just have pneumonia, who'd have thought they'd be glad to have that?? I got home about 10pm last night and went straight in the shower. I was sticky, hot, my chest still hurt badly and I HAD to wash my hair. I know you gals will understand that 1!! I have to rest up and stop trying to deny my body has been through hell. My electric bed comes on thursday so that's something to look forward to :o) Healing hugs and wishes to all of us xx