Another Sad Goodbye

I recently stopped having appointments with my psychiatrist, but I still have appointments with my counselor. My psychiatrist recommended that I should only keep seeing him only if I believe that I still need medication. He kept emphasizing that I should make a choice for myself. He told me something like he wasn't going to prescribe me medication unless he was certain I needed it. He prescribed me medication before because he believed it would help me. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome and depression and anxiety. I was given instructions to take one dose of a medication, then another instruction to take a different dose of the same medication, then I was told to take a new medication, and then, I was told to take a combination of the two medications. None of that helped me feel better. He did try and he was one of those psychiatrists that cared about their patients, but he only wanted to continue the appointments if I wanted to do so because I did tell him the medication wasn't helping. Since I told him that, he only wanted to continue the appointments if I wanted to do so.

I told him no. Then, we said our goodbyes. He told me stuff like I was a good person and to never forget that. He told me that I was like a friend. I felt a pain in chest when he said that. I was trying not to cry. We shook hands. He wanted a hug. I was reluctant because I was in pain, but I didn't want to leave him hanging. It hurts a little to even type all of this out. That's last time I saw him. He was just my psychiatrist and he was an old man, but he was one of the many nice people I've met in real life, and for one reason or another, I have to move on and not see him again.