Another birthday missed

Well today is my daughters 24th birthday.  It's the 2nd since the estrangement began.  I hadn't written her a note since November.  I had decided to just spend the time reflecting on how I could continue on with my life, and not live in continual grief, sadness and shame.  I went to pick out a card.  Usually I like to find a humorous card, but this situation just doesn't seem all that humorous.  I just bought a card that said how much she was loved.  I wrote in that card that I have always loved her, and will continue to love her very much no matter what.  Love, Mom.  That's it.  No telling her how much I miss her, or asking her to please call me, or to send a picture of my grandchildren, and no more money.  She has her own journey.  I wish I could see her.  I wish I could see my grandchildren, but my heart can't take anymore nastiness or unkindness or rejection.  I will love her no matter what.  I have told the bill collectors that I don't know where she is, and not to call me anymore so that has gotten better.  I am not going to worry about that either.  I wanted so much for her.  This is the life she's chosen, and she has the right to live it, whether I like it that way or not.  I don't like it.