Anger & Anxiety issues
I am still having a hard time transitioning off the paxil. Doc said to drop it at 10 mg due to serotonin overload and awful side effects. He upped cymbalta to 40 mg. I am sooo angry and anxious by midday I just want to scream and break things. When I start to feel that coming on I take .25mg xanax and it helps to cut the anxiety in half. I cant take more (allowed .50 twice a day) because then I can't function--I get very sleepy. I'm preparing for my hubby to bring his dad home from another state for a week. We just moved him to an independent/assisted living facility a few months ago. He's declining fast and is 88 yrs old. He's coming home for the week to see friends, say goodbyes, tie up loose ends, etc & meet the lady who is selling his condo. I really don't know how I'm supposed to go to work which is exhausting, get home at 5:30 dead tired, and worry about entertaining him, cooking, cleaning up, etc. My hubby is great & he will do a lot but I know hes exhausted from doing all dad's bills, moving his stuff, making the trip out to escort dad home. Every year its some new crisis with another family member. I am sooo tired. I want to go away somewhere alone--just me-- for at least a week. A retreat or monastary or somewhere peaceful--no phone, no tv. I'm afraid because I think about death alot when the anxiety builds really high. Doc says this will pass soon and to take the xanax. It's hard to stop crying and I don't want to go back to work til I'm evened out. Maybe I should just retire now instead of December. I feel like I'm dying inside. I'm so unhappy and I should be happy because I'm so grateful for all my wonderful family & friends. I don't want to drag them down--this depression will get old really quick, and then what? When does it end?
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