And the first time I left

Continuing on with my theme of looking back to move forward....after the particular incident mentioned in my last post, I knew I couldn't do this anymore. I could no longer really pretend my kids were oblivious to what was going on, he didn't care at that moment that he was hurting them too. I began to plot and plan as secretly as I could. My grandma and aunts and cousins had moved to the Tampa area a few years before and I asked if the kids and I could take a vacation there...I didn't ask him, I asked them if we could stay. I told my boss I had a family emergency and needed time off. About two weeks after this incident, I packed some clothes and food, put it in my car, took the kids to my mom's like normal and went to work like usual. I left early that day, picked up my kids and headed south. We drove straight through, 17 hours to get to my grandmother's house. He didn't realize we were missing for a few hours, but then he began harassing my mother and other family trying to find out where we were. After a week, my mom called me frantic because he told her that he had obtained a lawyer and was having me charged with kidnapping. I had no right to take his children away from him, he loved us so much and couldn't even understand why I had left when I had. He, rightly, claimed that we were getting along very well. He didn't lie, because after the incident he had been incredibly sweet and nice....for him. It didn't matter because I had seen what he was actually capable of. Anyway, I freaked out and came back to my mom's house here in Maryland. That night he showed up crying and asked if I would please just go for a ride with him to talk to him. Like a fool I went. He drove down to the water by the bridge, stopped the car, grabbed me by the hair and said, just as calmly as if he was asking the time, "if you ever try to leave me again, that's where you'll end up. They will never find you down there. Don't forget that." He then asked if I was ready to come home all while staying at me menacingly. I have in because I wasn't sure if he was serious or not. Either way his threat did the trick because I was terrified to try to leave again for a long time.