An Answer
Well, now I know why DH was in his UW in the basement. Apparently, he works out on the new rowing machine in his UW. (Saw this as I was picking beans along the basement wall.) Weird, but whatever.
He's still kind of clingy & was acting kind of mopey last night. And I notice that I don't even ask "What's wrong?" anymore. Maybe I should. But maybe part of me doesn't want to know. But I probably should--even if it is just to say to myself, "at least I asked/tried to find out."
I guess I'm just annoyed with the mopeyness. I feel as if he wants me to feel sorry for him. Well, I feel sorry for very few people because most can do something about whatever it is that's getting them down. Don't get me wrong, I do feel empathy for many people--I just don't feel sorry for them.
I was reflecting the other day about his clingyness--how every interaction with me seems like "too much": too much staring, too much grabbing, too much "you're cute/you're nice". It occurred to me that this is so in line with how his family operates. When we were out there last, I realized that their unspoken motto is: "you don't have enough; you need more!" Even when I was eating dinner: I needed more meat, more corn, more potatoes; even when I said I was full or fine with what I have, my FIL was like: "you need more ____!"
Any time they give a gift, most of what they give is something we/I already have or they will give multiples of the item. If I ask for, say, potholders, I'll get a TON of potholders--more than I could ever use in a lifetime. My BIL gives us multiple board games (we must have at least 7-8 versions of "Clue"). My MIL gave me a bunch of magazine subscriptions to similar magazines--just because I sometimes look at hers when we're visiting. Thing is, anytime you say anything like "I have enough magazines/board games/whatever", they feel personally rejected. (Ex., I cancelled one magazine because it was just a coupon magazine & I used none of the products in there. My MIL was so upset, even though I kept 2 other magazines.) "You don't have enough; you need more!" No such thing as moderation.
So I'm figuring that this is what DH is with his affections. I don't know why he or they are like this.
He's still kind of clingy & was acting kind of mopey last night. And I notice that I don't even ask "What's wrong?" anymore. Maybe I should. But maybe part of me doesn't want to know. But I probably should--even if it is just to say to myself, "at least I asked/tried to find out."
I guess I'm just annoyed with the mopeyness. I feel as if he wants me to feel sorry for him. Well, I feel sorry for very few people because most can do something about whatever it is that's getting them down. Don't get me wrong, I do feel empathy for many people--I just don't feel sorry for them.
I was reflecting the other day about his clingyness--how every interaction with me seems like "too much": too much staring, too much grabbing, too much "you're cute/you're nice". It occurred to me that this is so in line with how his family operates. When we were out there last, I realized that their unspoken motto is: "you don't have enough; you need more!" Even when I was eating dinner: I needed more meat, more corn, more potatoes; even when I said I was full or fine with what I have, my FIL was like: "you need more ____!"
Any time they give a gift, most of what they give is something we/I already have or they will give multiples of the item. If I ask for, say, potholders, I'll get a TON of potholders--more than I could ever use in a lifetime. My BIL gives us multiple board games (we must have at least 7-8 versions of "Clue"). My MIL gave me a bunch of magazine subscriptions to similar magazines--just because I sometimes look at hers when we're visiting. Thing is, anytime you say anything like "I have enough magazines/board games/whatever", they feel personally rejected. (Ex., I cancelled one magazine because it was just a coupon magazine & I used none of the products in there. My MIL was so upset, even though I kept 2 other magazines.) "You don't have enough; you need more!" No such thing as moderation.
So I'm figuring that this is what DH is with his affections. I don't know why he or they are like this.
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