Am I Gay?

SEnuke: Ready for action

Am I Gay? I assume this is a question plenty of young men will have asked themselves during their confusing adolescent years; it's certainly one which every gay person will sometime have had to tackle, and come to terms with on discovering the real solution. Needless to say, you will find the lucky ones - most - the individuals for whom their sex never been in any question. They're the individuals who, by their accepted power and heterosexual appetite with the opposite-sex, could have caused that eager question in other minds. But to not be among that majority, to not have the exact same hunger for the opposite sex, doesn't straight away make anyone gay.

Times are changing slowly, perhaps too slowly, for some children still develop in a overwhelmingly heterosexual world - a world that will by its very existence from an earlier age have instilled expectations and preconceived some ideas in every boy's mind - so if the time come that he reaches puberty, and his juvenile decades, and he finds that those expectations are not being met as they are by his friends, he becomes concerned. He begins to think that he is different to the partners that he was raised with - and it troubles him. To get further information, please check-out: different types of gay. But trouble is too weak a word. At this time of human development to suddenly maybe not be placed along with one's peers can be destructive. The questioning and gnawing fears in a boy's head may remain closely guarded secrets - since they have to be.

Confronted with this experience to be different, young men may respond in many different ways. Just a few may deal with the situation quickly. Some may become reclusive; some may turn to bullying others; some to consume and drugs; and some may certainly turn towards criminal behaviour to get their essential kudos - nevertheless, many will attempt to maintain an act: an appearance of being completely 'regular.' This act, and the experience of a need to prove them-selves for their family and friends, will most likely only exasperate the problem. And when thoughts for the same sex enter their heads, thoughts they may feel to be bad or wrong, a great feeling of guilt may engulf them. It can be a very anxious amount of time in a man's life. It is a time when some might even come to con-sider suicide - and that, just the result of the teachings, the failings and the objectives of a mainly unaware heterosexual world, should not be!

Adolescence, and the functioning of the equipment, gets to different times for different people. There's nothing wrong or unpleasant about being a builder - many races are won by people who had a bad start. And even once every thing is available to be in working order, it is quite usual for the emotions and the dreams that appear around this time to be 'strange', to convey the least! The sudden surge of hormones the body has to attempt to make some sense from can for some bring forth rather distinct cravings, fascinations, and sights. Right now it is maybe not unusual for many who will later be 'regular' heterosexual men to get 'a crush' on someone of the same sex. It may be a schoolmaster; it may be a pal - it can be anyone, you can find no rules, and it may not just be the one individual - it may be several. There is nothing wrong, and this is simply not the time to worry one's sexual orientation; more a time to contemplate its prospects.

For many who've attained this point, they'll have had no preparation for the choice sexual orientations that life can deal out. Such could be the a deep failing of culture, for around one in ten males will prove to be gay, and around one in five males will at some time in their lives have gay sex. Every one of these folks will soon be some proud parent's son. They are often anyone's child. These are facts that could be difficult to recognize by many people, but alive itself they are the 'normal.'

Sexual orientation is not genealogical, neither could it be developed by problem, marketing, lifestyle or by any other means - and regardless of what anybody may possibly tell you, or claim, it almost certainly cannot be changed. It's everything you are. Were it to be any different, then in a widely heterosexual culture, and with few gay people actually reproducing, by long before now there might have been no gay people left on the planet. But it is a known fact the proportion of gay people on earth has varied little throughout all history, and character has seen fit to maintain this status-quo, although we might yet perhaps not understand the reason for it.

We now come to the emergency question: how do I know if I am gay? Perhaps the easy answer is - you just know. Nevertheless you do need to wait until all those hormones have settled down a bit before asking the question. Once that has happened the sexual needs and cravings will soon be significantly better fed and nurtured by the thoughts and dreams of each one or the other of both sexes. Crudely put: what-ever makes you 'cum' the simplest and the very best will give you the solution. Just for some individuals this may be equal, or it may change repeatedly during their lives, and they're what we term as being: bisexual.

Gay, straight or bisexual, it matters not - you're unique, and you're you. What-ever sexuality you may well be, no two folks are ever the same - not really identical twins. Be proud of who and what you are, and if you find that you are gay or bisexual then remember that that is quite usual in the great scheme of things, it's only some regions of society that still have a problem with this - and the problem is theirs, perhaps not yours.

Among the biggest mysteries on the planet today is just why some individuals have a problem with another person's sexuality considering all the great names there have been throughout history that have been known to not be heterosexual. Good emperors, leaders, war-lords, painters, writers, poets, artists, composers, pop singers, style gurus, astrologers, philosophers, designers, engineers and many, many others all enjoying pride of place in history have been either gay or bi-sexual - the number is practically unlimited, and it also includes a pope or two! Their sexual orientation never distracted these individuals - it will not need to hamper you.

Judy Garland is reputed to have said: 'Continually be a first-rate version of your self, instead of a second-rate version of someone else.' There could be no better advice. Another price I love came from the late, great, and still unfortunately missed Dusty Springfield: 'My sexuality has never been a problem if you ask me but I think it has been for others.'

There is nothing at all wrong with being gay, nevertheless it does come with some problems that heterosexuals never have to face. There's the gay world - known by all to be once promiscuous - and it's what a gay person can be seen as being an integral part of by many ignorant heterosexual people though it's representative of less-than a quarter of all gay people. Then there's the whole 'developing' saga. I discovered bisexual by searching Google. In case you come out to friends and family, at work, to all and sundry, or not take action at all? Facing up to this situation may be traumatic for some people - and whatever you finally choose to be best for you, also remaining 'in the cabinet', it will not be without some benefits. These problems I will cover in separate articles - look out for them!

- Michael..