Alone and miserable
I've been busting my ass at Lowe's for the health insurance that only offers $1,000 coverage annually. I exhausted that in two months so now I am in a shitty position where I have to ration Lyrica and trying to only take them on work days (I can only work three days a week because I'm so fucking sick). The lyrica cost $171 to refill, btw.
So I didn't take it Monday, Tuesday or today. Last night I got the worst night's sleep but at least I slept. I took two sleeping pills and still, the pain overwhelmed the melatonin and I was up writhing in pain. By the time my body was so exhausted from writhing and I drifted off into a nightmare inducing sleep, I was hit by a severe migraine around 10am. I got about four hours of sleep.
Then I tried to keep my date with Mom and continue planning this month's move (no idea how I'm going to pull that off). It went better than I expected but by the end of the night, she was driving me home while I was curled up in a ball in pain in the passenger seat. I still had tons to do at home so I went straight to bed for some hopefully relaxing chatting before I started packing and getting ready for my work weak.
Borgy cheered me up before I was overwhelmed by abdominal cramping, intense nausea and urgency. The pain was so intense that by the end of the bm I realized I had been clenching my hands so hard that they were completely numb. It took all of my strength to not hit the walls. I was crying out in pain and tears were rolling down my cheeks as I was puking into the trash can at the same time.
It's nights like this that I hate being alone and I miss being married. I'm so torn about moving in with Mom. I'm 27 years old, moving back in with my mom and that hurts my pride. I don't want her to see me like this and I should be taking care of her but I'm so thankful I won't be alone anymore.
So I didn't take it Monday, Tuesday or today. Last night I got the worst night's sleep but at least I slept. I took two sleeping pills and still, the pain overwhelmed the melatonin and I was up writhing in pain. By the time my body was so exhausted from writhing and I drifted off into a nightmare inducing sleep, I was hit by a severe migraine around 10am. I got about four hours of sleep.
Then I tried to keep my date with Mom and continue planning this month's move (no idea how I'm going to pull that off). It went better than I expected but by the end of the night, she was driving me home while I was curled up in a ball in pain in the passenger seat. I still had tons to do at home so I went straight to bed for some hopefully relaxing chatting before I started packing and getting ready for my work weak.
Borgy cheered me up before I was overwhelmed by abdominal cramping, intense nausea and urgency. The pain was so intense that by the end of the bm I realized I had been clenching my hands so hard that they were completely numb. It took all of my strength to not hit the walls. I was crying out in pain and tears were rolling down my cheeks as I was puking into the trash can at the same time.
It's nights like this that I hate being alone and I miss being married. I'm so torn about moving in with Mom. I'm 27 years old, moving back in with my mom and that hurts my pride. I don't want her to see me like this and I should be taking care of her but I'm so thankful I won't be alone anymore.
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