ahh man...

Well i guess tonight wasnt all that bad. I went to hang out with my "friend" who im totally fuckin in love with, had a good time...was fun. Learned tonight that im a friend, and thats all ill be.  She was talking about some dude to me she dated and what a total idiot he was....and then was telling me how much she wanted to go ask out some new employee at her work...agony to hear but a friend i was. Unfortunatly , I cant be friend with this girl, everytime she opens her mouth she says something to total make me weak....even looking at her makes me happy... I just dont think a friendship like that is healthy...esspecially when i want so much more...and she does not. On the upside, i know im not ready to date...not since my divorce. I was going to make an exception for this girl, I was going to do whatever it took... Now i guess i dont have too...hehe.