Man this sucks.  I am overflowing with too many emotions.  Just when I thought I was back on track I am reminded that I am derailed.  I was never in control, so I plan everything, but surprize I am thrown a curveball and I fold.  I was going to go to school, but I  had a plan and they messed up the paperwork and my plan was faulty so I freaked out.  I used to think that everyone was talking about me, of course they were not.  But now years later people are and I feel worse. Of all places the gossip is at my Church.  Which incidentally was where my daughter was molested, which kicked up my past right in my face.  We still go to the Church but it is getting to me more than I knew.  This past week I stayed home every day and to my surprise I felt much better.  However I feel like I am switching from one prison to another.  Now I am talking like a major downer so I will leave on a positive note.  Jesus loves me and you faults and all.