against the wind

I worked hard at making my business successful.  Long hours, working through pain.  Every time I get ahead, he would sabotage it some way.   take down my website for months, delete all my files, destroy product, call customers..when I was ready to give up and get a job somewhere else, he threatened to throw me out penniless,, to make sure I got fired from that job.. whatever it took.. So I pressed on trying to rebuild y business again.  He insisted I get a outside location.. I found one I could afford, spent the hours and hours cleaning and getting it ready. meeting all the codes, getting my Licences.. he Promised he would not interfere.. but of course if I did one thing that he did not want.. here came the threats, all funding cut off. he would remove all my equipment.. he would throw a scene in front of my Neighbors and customers..etc.. anytime I was working and not with him, I got the constant calls when are you going to be done.. If anything took longer than I expected, I got berated.. nothing is ever good enough, I never make enough, I am Lazy, I am worthless, I am garbage... how many times have I heard those words from him?    On my opening day I was so proud.. something of my own.. something I accomplished... a space I could be alone in to work without disruption.. but that did not last.  h insisted I get someone else to help cover expenses.. I did, and her business is taking off while mine is failing..so she takes over more room and I am pushed aside, only good enough to clean her mess too...  I am 54, in pain, I want so much to make this work.. but I am so tired of fighting against the wind.....I know it is control.. and I am not in control of me...