After Christmas
Well Christmas day was a great day. I have company staying with me for 2 weeks. A family from here in the park. They gave me a "How to Knit" kit, which is fantastic because I really want to learn how to knit. Then my son is at his Dad's for Christmas he came over Christmas Eve and had a gift for me. I asked if I could open it on Christmas Day as it was the only gift from any of my family that I received and I wanted to open it in front of my son on Christmas Day. He said okay and I told him I would call me on Christmas Day from Dorothy's house next door to his father's house so he could come over while I opened it. It was a new digital camera. When I visited him in New Jersey during Thanksgiving he noticed my camera was not working right. I cried with happiness. It was so wonderful. Then Dorothy who is 81 and Mabel 92 went with me driving to a Chinese buffet for dinner. Afterward I took them to see some Christmas lights. So it was a great day.
My daughter refused to see me or call me. I left her a message on her answering machine and sent a Christmas Stocking with a card in it too her when I gave my son his. But there has been no comment. My son has not called since then. I just can't take it. This is killing me. I just want to cry.Everyone else is so nice too me. Another friend bought me a diamond and emerald pendant and matching earrings. Another gave me a t-shirt and necklace to match. I had no money to buy actual gifts so I went to the dollar store and got some stockings and filled them with candies and cookies that Jake made with me. I feel like such a scum bucket because I didn't get gifts for any of them. I never heard from my sister or father, so they either died or just don't want to have anything to do with me. I guess I am better off in a mental hospital because then no one could contact me. I got not one Christmas card. Granted I didn't send any, but I was prepared to send cards to any one that sent one to me. I don't have all my addresses. I just wasn't prepared when I left my husband. I thought I would be able to get my things. But now they are all gone. I cry and die, but I just have to accept it. I lost all my personal possessions when my husband threw me out.
I just miss my family. My kids, my husband, the cats. All of it.
My daughter refused to see me or call me. I left her a message on her answering machine and sent a Christmas Stocking with a card in it too her when I gave my son his. But there has been no comment. My son has not called since then. I just can't take it. This is killing me. I just want to cry.Everyone else is so nice too me. Another friend bought me a diamond and emerald pendant and matching earrings. Another gave me a t-shirt and necklace to match. I had no money to buy actual gifts so I went to the dollar store and got some stockings and filled them with candies and cookies that Jake made with me. I feel like such a scum bucket because I didn't get gifts for any of them. I never heard from my sister or father, so they either died or just don't want to have anything to do with me. I guess I am better off in a mental hospital because then no one could contact me. I got not one Christmas card. Granted I didn't send any, but I was prepared to send cards to any one that sent one to me. I don't have all my addresses. I just wasn't prepared when I left my husband. I thought I would be able to get my things. But now they are all gone. I cry and die, but I just have to accept it. I lost all my personal possessions when my husband threw me out.
I just miss my family. My kids, my husband, the cats. All of it.
Replies
Oh dear. I\'m sorry to hear you are sad. I know you have lost so much but your true friends are still with you. I would love to have a stocking full of homemade goodies.
You were given a learn to knit kit. Just think of what you will be able to give next year. I always appreciate gifts that someone took the time to make.
You weren\'t totally alone. You have friends and you went out to eat. Try not to look back but keep your eyes forward on making a future. It won\'t be the future of your past but a better future with people who are true friends.
12/28/10 10pm
It sounds like you and your son have made a step in the right direction. As you said your gift was one he thought about, seeing your old camera knowing you needed a new one. These small steps will lead to bigger and bigger steps towards each other. Before you know it your daughter will get older and wiser and start making her own steps towards you. Time heals so much. I hope it also heals you too.
I don\'t like knitting but love to crochet. I have made many afghans (sp?) for everyone.
My sister, brother-in-law, my daughter and I also went out to a Chinese buffet for Christmas dinner. Later when the rest of my family came over we had desserts together.
Your a strong person so you won\'t need to spend time in the mental ward waiting for someone to contact you. Wait right where you are so everyone knows where you are when they all realize the hurt they have caused you.
Your friends will be there to help you along the way.
Sending you prayers, love, peace, (((Hugs))), and friendship.
Georganna, You always seem to know the right things to say. You are right I need to stay right where I am. Right now I am dying. The pain of not seeing my daughter is killing me. And now my son has taken 2 giant steps backward and won\'t answer my calls, nor will he call me. It was like a dream his coming to see, but now reality has to set in. I need something that keeps my mind off of what I don\'t have any more, which was my entire life and need to find some way to help others, as that is what keeps my mind off of my problems, but allows me to live a normal life. If you can think of something let me know. Again Thanks for listening(reading)my problems, you always have the nicest way of helping me.
Mary Ann
12/29/10 3pm
Mary Ann
I\'m sure it hurts that your daughter hasn\'t contacted you, but give her time. I\'m sure both of your children aren\'t getting the guidance they should be getting from your ex or his family. They\'re both at an age where its easier to just hang with friends and not face issues.
I\'m not sure you son has taken 2 giant steps backwards he is also enjoying being with friends he doesn\'t get to see while away at college. Let\'s just pray for them and see what God can do.
Regarding keeping your mind busy, you got the perfect gift from your friend. Get busy, start knitting, make baby blankets, make blankets, make scarfs, make anything. Nursing home patients love getting homemade gifts. Donate baby blankets to hospitals and homeless shelters. Knit, Knit, Knit. You\'ll meet people while giving greatly needded gifts.
When I was young my Aunt taught me how to knit, but i didn\'t find it to relaxing, so if you have the same problem try crocheting. Also if you are having problem with the knitting look for groups in your area that get together and help each other. Look into you Library they have a lot of crafty things available. Try you Senior Centers they love helping each other.
OK, now I feel bad I don\'t have much time to do all that but if you have the time give it all a try.
Mary Ann I\'m sending you comfort, love (((hugs))), and again my friendship.
Georgeanna