Advice???
ok. i guess im taking a poll here. see, while my daughter is a very happy baby, and not bad at all as far as babies go... at the same time she is very needy. she always has to be near you, wants you to play with her, and be part of what you are doing. if you are holding her she is happy. but i never get anything done!! and now if i put her down she cries. people tell me to just let her cry. but i dont know. i have mixed feelings. she is still so young. i try to walk away a bit, but i feel awful cause i want her to trust me. today she is having bad dreams. i just know she is. she keeps waking up screaming, and that is not like her. i want her to know im there for her. i dont want her to feel alone. so as soon as she goes back to sleep i put her back down. but in general i dont know what to do really. i dont want this to escalate to a problem later with her, but i dont want to just leave her there crying either. she dont like the swing.... or mobiles.... or anything, unless you are right there. even car rides are a bit difficult at times. ok... so cyber family. what do i do? and lol. the people who tell me to let her cry, pick her up too.... on another note. everything else is pretty ok. having alot of erratic emotions and having trouble getting hold of my brain to organize any thoughts. i guess thats normal though. i dont know though. it scares me a bit with me. i dont want to be the way i was before, EVER. im much happier now. looking back i thought it was just gambling i was out of control with. but really it was everything. my whole life. im so lucky to be where i am now, and not there. the only complaint i have right now is my living arrangements. and even that isnt so bad. and im stressed with new baby and all, but im having fun too. and i realized i have fun with this guy in my life. thats nice. im not analyzing everything. sometimes mybrain tries to... but really im not. i have fun with him. and he is the first person i ever been with that i dont worry will tell me that i will go to hell when i die because i dont believe in the bible. he makes me laugh. and i appreciate that. and he deals with my crazy times. he came over and took the baby the other day, so that i could get some stuff done. he watched her for a couple hours so i could go out with a friend. and im a little jealous cause she slept the whole night through after he had put her to sleep. the weight thing is starting to bother me less. on him anyway. im in a hurry to get well enough to do things. i went on a walk today. will post some pictures. im up all night it seems today. cant sleep.
Replies
Sweetie, I believe that babies need to be held a lot, where they\'re tiny. Shoot, she rode around inside you for nine whole months, she likes the motion and the warmth of her mommy, it seems so natural to me. I couldn\'t stand to let mine just cry, plus I loved holding them, rocking them, walking with them, I even used a snuggly, do you have one, left my hands free. Then when she gets a little bigger, and can start to scoot around a bit on her own, she\'ll want you to put her down. I really encourage new mommies to enjoy their new little bundles, because of that. Holding her a lot now, can prevent her from turning into a baby who always wants to be carried, or always has to cry herself to sleep. Know what I mean? Many, many others don\'t agree with me, they believe babies should learn to cry themselves to sleep, not me. You\'re doing a great job, Mom! xxxooo
That was a hug I just sent you... if you\'re going to hell, so am I! lol
I swear, it gets easier as you\'re little one gets bigger. And moms have the right to do it their way, don\'t let anyone else tell you what they think you should do, I mean, it\'s okay to listen to their advice, and mine, and then to make up your own mind on how you want to raise your child. She\'s only gonna\' be tiny for a short period of time, then she\'ll be a toddler...awwwww...then a kid, then one of us...an adult... I flies by so fast! At least it did for moi... Leila, my grand baby, 2 and a half, still likes to be held, and cuddled, and her hugs & kisses are the absolute best. My babies, 20 & 24, got too big for me to still be able to carry them around...lol...but they\'re hugs are right up there with Leila\'s, the best I ever had... I don\'t know if anyone else would agree with this, but I sure did notice that when I left my babies with sitters, they usually slept most of the time that I was away. I\'ve always thought they were waiting for me, good babies for the sitters, waiting for mama to come home. When my kids were little, I worked swing shift until both were in school full time, then I worked days. But what I was gonna\' say is, they slept most of the time I work swing... I didn\'t get enough sleep at all, cos\' I got up early with them... I was young, I could take it, don\'t know if I could hang in there at my age now, I am a grandma, after all! Anyway, those swing shifts are long gone, and my kids are on their own... the time flew by... no matter what, enjoy your baby...can\'t wait for some pic\'s! Take care, mom..Love, Grandma Robin 8)
Hello, I had a sling and toted my kids around \'til my back went (not a good idea). But with the sling (or pouch) you can get quite a lot done and they seem to like being close, just don\'t use it if cooking or ironing and ditch it when baby gets heavier. Robin is right, there are people that say \"leave them to cry\" and others (like me) who carted them around everywhere. You just have to do what\'s right for you and your daughter.
The time does fly....and before you know it, she\'ll be running around and getting into everything...enjoy every minute...Love, light and peace from the land of Aus.
Hi, hon. You sound really good. As far as your little one, trust your own instincts. Sometimes babies just need to be held, sometimes they are just going to be fussy. Like the others say, she\'ll grow up way too fast - cherish every moment. Hugs, Deb
Hi there....as you know, my kids are grown, but I agree with Robin and Mike. I carried them around until I couldn\'t lift them anymore LOL. I couldn\'t just let them cry like the doctor suggested. They liked it, and I got nothing done. But, she\'ll only be a baby once, the house will be dirty or laundry will need done and a million other things, when she\'s older....don\'t let the time pass without enjoying her; you\'re a good mom; it\'s not easy, and do let your instincts guide you. Wishing you well...
hugs, Brigette
I can only say that if I could shrink my daughter back into a baby I would have spent less time cleaning my house and more time carrying my daughter around. :)