Accepting being alone....
I sit here tonight at the computer with the TV on. I have to vent, so bear with me. This is how my nights will go from now on. It's scary to think that this how the rest of my life will be. Yes, I could go out and join alot of clubs and do alot of activities, but I'm not really interested in doing that. I enjoy being at home and doing my thing. Guess now that my "other half" is gone, I will spending my days alone. I better get used to it.
I went out to the RV repair shop where my bus was being repaired. The repairs are done, so I paid the bill. The buyers are coming on Saturday to pick it up. Yet another piece of my married life will by driving away.
I haven't seen my sons much lately. They have their lives to live and I don't expect them to see me every day. If they want something or want a good meal they will come by.
I have tried to get house repairs done, but as of yet, nothing has been done. I have gotten estimates, but I doubt that anything will actually get done until next spring or summer. Oh well, guess I'm not going anywhere for awhile. I do the best I can and do what I can. I became very independent when Chuck would deply when he was in the Navy
When Chuck was ill, we had a steady stream of folks checking on us, wondering how we were doing. This lasted a short time after he died, but now seems like my "support network" has vanished. Everyone is back to their lives "doing their thing". Other than this site, I don't have anyone to talk to and that really understands. Possibly other have experienced this.
I know that all of this is part of God's "master plan" but sometimes I wonder why I'm here. One reason is for my youngest, who one night told he needed a Mom. He may...money, good food, but not my company. He has a new wife and friends and certainly doesn't want to hang with an old woman. My other son spends time with friends and doesn't want to hang with me either. So, that leaves me in my house alone and going to work occasionally.
It's very frightening to accept the fact that this is how the rest of my life will be. Chuck accepted me for who I am and was so comfortable to just be with doing nothing.
Enought rambling....rest peacefully my soulmate. I miss you so much.
Nancy
I went out to the RV repair shop where my bus was being repaired. The repairs are done, so I paid the bill. The buyers are coming on Saturday to pick it up. Yet another piece of my married life will by driving away.
I haven't seen my sons much lately. They have their lives to live and I don't expect them to see me every day. If they want something or want a good meal they will come by.
I have tried to get house repairs done, but as of yet, nothing has been done. I have gotten estimates, but I doubt that anything will actually get done until next spring or summer. Oh well, guess I'm not going anywhere for awhile. I do the best I can and do what I can. I became very independent when Chuck would deply when he was in the Navy
When Chuck was ill, we had a steady stream of folks checking on us, wondering how we were doing. This lasted a short time after he died, but now seems like my "support network" has vanished. Everyone is back to their lives "doing their thing". Other than this site, I don't have anyone to talk to and that really understands. Possibly other have experienced this.
I know that all of this is part of God's "master plan" but sometimes I wonder why I'm here. One reason is for my youngest, who one night told he needed a Mom. He may...money, good food, but not my company. He has a new wife and friends and certainly doesn't want to hang with an old woman. My other son spends time with friends and doesn't want to hang with me either. So, that leaves me in my house alone and going to work occasionally.
It's very frightening to accept the fact that this is how the rest of my life will be. Chuck accepted me for who I am and was so comfortable to just be with doing nothing.
Enought rambling....rest peacefully my soulmate. I miss you so much.
Nancy
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