abuse
It's not physically abusive but emotionally abusive. My son, J, is so angry with me because I refuse to let him drive. His MRI didn't work the other day because his leg wouldn't stop shaking so it was postponed until after Christmas. It's like having a caged animal. I would have been more than happy to take him to his friend's house (which is a few towns over) but he was badgering me so much, swearing, and throwing things I just wouldn't allow it. Dad to the rescue! He came home just in time to take him. I almost hate my husband sometimes. "Almost". Today is the first snow and it's been very slippery on the roads but he told my son that it would be alright for him to drive. What? Without talking to me. He said he told my son that it's alright with him but he would "check with Mom". Thank you. Now it's obvious that it's just Mom and Dad is fine with it. Husband said "It's just in town". Our son is still limping, taking pain medicine (not very often - thank goodness) and we don't know really what condition his knee is in. A friend suggested that we not let him drive because of car insurance purposes. We could get sued , apparently, if he got into an accident and had his bum knee.
I need a vacation away from everybody - including my husband. He rolls his eyes like I'm the one. I don't get it. He was like this when I pushed to get our youngest into drug treatment (that he so desperately needed). He was so angry with me because our son was upset about going.
Despite all this ~ I am holding my ground. Sometimes I feel like I have 4 boys (no make that 3 - my oldest has a better head on his shoulders when it comes to common sense than my husband).
Just venting. This too shall pass.....
I need a vacation away from everybody - including my husband. He rolls his eyes like I'm the one. I don't get it. He was like this when I pushed to get our youngest into drug treatment (that he so desperately needed). He was so angry with me because our son was upset about going.
Despite all this ~ I am holding my ground. Sometimes I feel like I have 4 boys (no make that 3 - my oldest has a better head on his shoulders when it comes to common sense than my husband).
Just venting. This too shall pass.....
Replies
Come visit me, don\'t know where you live but I\'ve needed a vacation from the drama before. Your husband should not of over rode what you said. You were correct, I know its hard and the throwing things etc is nerve racking. Wanted to mention I was talking to my therapist this week she see\'s a lot of parents and teens these days because of drugs. I told her about how when my daughter was a teen, 16 and 17 I physically sat on her to make her not go out. I also stuck to my word if I said no I didn\'t give in. She told me this is where parents go wrong, you have to stick to your word do not give in. She knows some teens are extremely head strong but still let them know these are the rules, I love you but its my house. Also if you can\'t trust them, search their rooms and if activity still keeps up, remove the door to their room. Take back control of your house and tell your husband he is enabling.
Hugs
O wow, O wow....I hear the pain in all that. Been there, too. Does husb. not want to be the \'tough guy\'?
It\'s a realy tough spot to be in for you, being the naysayer. Especially with husb. going \"o it\'s all right\" to your son!!! I felt really angry when it happened to me, and yet didn\'t want to have son\'s addiction issues create a big wedge between us. I think that\'s why it\'s a tough spot.
I bet by now you have chosen a plan of action.