A reply Post from ParentsofEstrangedAdultChildrenEverywhere
I just had to "eat a major guilt trip" over curtailing a friendship in which I felt I was being abused. Ordinarily, I would have probably stayed in said "friendship" but thanks to some of the EC groups (including this one) on DS that I belong to -- I said "NO ~ Major No!!"I have learned to set my boundaries, make choices in the healthy function of my life, and to stand my ground in order to bring that about! I have to come to accept it as fact that I have no influence over how my EC are going to feel towards me. The last thing I need to do is to hand the steering of my life over to them as they care for no one but themselves.No amount of bowing, scraping or cajoling will accomplish anything short of my own personal humiliation! There was a time when I, in desperation, tried to do what I could think of to change the situation. Then I decided to change me instead. It was after hanging this prayer in my bathroom where I am reminded daily, "God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Courage to change the things I can and Wisdom to know the difference." that I came to this conclusion.I don't think they will ever change.. But I have!
NDY
PEACE be with you ...
NDY
PEACE be with you ...
Replies
Yes, I know what you mean.
What a lovely journal you wrote here.
Good evening NDY! What an incredable lady! just read all your journals. What strength and determination you have and show. I am also a child or God learning new things each day. Trying to change MY ways also. It\'s been very very difficult for me. Maybe you could message me some advice when you have time! Thank you so much for the friend invite. Glad to be here with you. Cat.........
aacept that some people will not change ...Wisdom to learn the difference, indeed.
It\'s very powerful.
I like the fact you mention that we ought not to give our pwer to others. Once this is done, the relationship cannot be right. Thanks for that. A lot is written in those few words, and a lot to make me think about too.
You know Ndy you are such a sweet lady I just hope you get blessed with wonderful things. I know you have been through some awful times.Those children will never know unless they go through what you have been through. But as parents we can only pray they understand , I see it as their loss. big hug my friend, bunch