A new day rite... wrong

So I've expressed my concerns and as usual they've been ignored. I was devastated when I found out that she was having a boy... and she lied and said it would be different with this one and again I'm left out... he's 2 weeks old and I've only fed him 5 times... The excuse that was given was "he's breastfed what do you expect?" But I fed our other son more so I don't believe that... I try to pull away get more and more consumed with work but I still come to the house and get hit wit the same realization... I feel like I'm drowning... I can't have any more of my own kids and the ones I gave birth to are waaaaay older... I would say I know how fathers feel but I don't even get that much... I don't want to lose the kids but it feels like they're already gone... Idk what i really expected... I say something it's ignored she doesn't even remember I'm Hoh... either that or mumbles or speaks low on purpose... I think all of this to hurt me... I wish I wasn't so codependent... wish I cud make myself numb... No such luck 2day tho...
 
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