A Little Independence for All
Now I'm re-examining the things that I do for the family & ask myself: is this something they can do for themselves? What needs to be taught/shown in order for them to do it, if anything?
So on Saturday, I had my daughter strip her bed & I showed her how to operate the washer to wash her bedding. I also had her put the bedding on. She did not like it a bit, but she did it.
My son, I told him that from now on, I'm not washing my hair for him. He was shocked. "But you do it so much better than me!" and other excuses. My take? "It's your hair, you wash it!" And I told him: "From now on, you need to take care of your own stuff." Him: "I don't like where this is going, Mom!" But you know what? He went into the shower without me nagging him, did his own hair...and? did a pretty good job on it & I told him so.
Next: room vacuuming! But I'll wait for Saturday to spring that on them.
As far as my H goes: yesterday, I made dinner. I put away my dishes, but left the serving dishes on the table for him to put away. Time went on; he was reading his comics, putzing around, etc. Eventually, I went to listen to a webinar & when I came back downstairs, all was put away...I think he got the message!
But the bottom line is: I'm not doing anyone any favors when everyone is capable of doing things for themselves. No one has broken hands; nothing is brain surgery. I guess you could say this is an extension of "my stuff/their stuff".
So on Saturday, I had my daughter strip her bed & I showed her how to operate the washer to wash her bedding. I also had her put the bedding on. She did not like it a bit, but she did it.
My son, I told him that from now on, I'm not washing my hair for him. He was shocked. "But you do it so much better than me!" and other excuses. My take? "It's your hair, you wash it!" And I told him: "From now on, you need to take care of your own stuff." Him: "I don't like where this is going, Mom!" But you know what? He went into the shower without me nagging him, did his own hair...and? did a pretty good job on it & I told him so.
Next: room vacuuming! But I'll wait for Saturday to spring that on them.
As far as my H goes: yesterday, I made dinner. I put away my dishes, but left the serving dishes on the table for him to put away. Time went on; he was reading his comics, putzing around, etc. Eventually, I went to listen to a webinar & when I came back downstairs, all was put away...I think he got the message!
But the bottom line is: I'm not doing anyone any favors when everyone is capable of doing things for themselves. No one has broken hands; nothing is brain surgery. I guess you could say this is an extension of "my stuff/their stuff".
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