A little better today.
I have taken care of a lot of things this week. I have been tested for HIV and STD's and all the results are NEGATIVE!! I had my first theapy session yesterday. I really like my therapist so far. I hope to get myself together. These are all things my BH has asked me to do. I was going to do them anyway for his sake. I am preparing myself legally and financially for the worst, that is my BH won't work on our marraige. I am still terrified of losing him but it was a little less frightening today. I have never been alone...My worry today is that I am not strong enough to fight for our marriage and by that I don't mean the temptation of the OM but the strength to endure his anger and pain. I pray that GOD gives me strength.
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Would really like to hear from other W spouses. I truly want to rebuild my marriage, making it stronger if possible. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle the guilt, and anger towards oneself for what they did? I don\'t want to be excused I just want to be strong for what my BH has to do to get better.
Today is terrible! I am so lost and confused. I am trying desparately to hang on the my marraige. I am having a hard time dealing with my BH\'s anger and pain. I so want to ease his pain and make things better for him. I am so afraid of losing him and my son. I know \"should\'ve thought about that before the A\" well I wasn\'t thinking at all during that time. How do you go on? How do you continue to take it and hang your head in shame? I know I deserve the wrath but I just need to know how to take it. DOes it ever get better for the BS? For the WS?
How long as it been? Get a copy of NOT JUST FRIENDS -- my BW gave it to me and it really helps.
It\'s still very fresh. Tomorrow will be two weeks since D-DAY but he had known a while before then. I know it will take time I understand that, but I just wonder how to cope and deal with their anger.
I am so sorry for your pain. I can actually feel your pain and sense your sincere remourse and regret for betraying your H. My H and I have both been unfaithful in our marriage. Just know that God will give you the strength and guidance you need to get through this. God is right there beside you helping you endure the pain. It sounds like you are on the right path, by having the STD tests done and counseling. Hang in there and take it one day at a time. Every thing is still very fresh, but within time, things should begin to improve if your H is willing to meet you half way. Big hugs to you :)
Thank you for the hugs. The trouble is that my husband doesn\'t know yet if he wants to work on our marriage; much less meet me halfway.
Well then you just keep fighting for your marriage with everthing you have in you.
Have you tried couples counseling? You can\'t fix it all yourself. You need to figure out what\'s wrong in the marriage, and you both need to fix it. Good luck. (((HUGS)))
I am in IC now. My H says he\'ll go for me, but not \"marriage counseling.\" I personally believe he\'s afraid of what might be said and or what might come out in the session.