A lightened heart

After tucking Matt in for the night, as I usually do, I looked over at Sharry's picture, and quietly told her about the day, assuring her that our son is doing well, and I am doing my best every day. Last night ,I also asked her if she could just reassure me that I will be with her one day, even if I am still here for a long time. I didn't know the answer would come so soon, or in such a clever, touching way. It is my habit now, part of the new normal, I guess, to put on a playlist of music on my iPad, put on the headphones (after Letterman's monologue of course) and drift off to sleep. Normally I will wake up sometime after the music has played through, remove the headphones, and go to sleep for the night. The list I selected last night was about 40 songs long, by the band Kansas. One of the songs, a bit over halfway through the list, is called Lamplight Symphony. It is the only song by them, or any band that I know of, that is the story of a widower who is visited one lonely night by his wife's spirit, to comfort him. I had listened to this song from the album Song For America, on and off, for almost 40 years. I never, ever, dreamed back then, that I would one day become a widower, like the man in this song. I drifted to sleep, maybe three or four songs into the list, as I was exhausted. The next thing I remember, was feeling an urgency to wake out of the deep sleep I was in. I remember thinking, why am I being woke up, no noise, nothing coming from the monitor in Matt's room, yet awake I am. Then, I heard the very last set of lyrics being sung in my ears, as the song "Lamplight Symphony" neared it's conclusion. The words my wife chose for me to reassure her husband, yet once more:
"He stood before the window, gazing at the grave
And with a lightened heart, he saw the first of dawn
He knew that she was waiting
And that some day they'd be as one"
Thank you Sweetie, I will never forget this, and will go forward with these words close to my heart.